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Critical Analysis #2
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Lonley and Alone
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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Lonley and Alone |
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pen&paper Senior Member
since 2006-06-06
Posts 513
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Possibilities lie ahead Happiness accompanied by dread What I’ll do and who I’ll be Where I’ll go and who I’ll see Some tell me- I’m better than the rest That there’s no need for this distress But I strongly disagree For you see It’s only me No one else On this road I walk By myself Without love Lonely And Alone |
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| © Copyright 2006 Cierra L. Robbeloth - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Shaddow1 Junior Member
since 2006-09-04
Posts 41Kingman Az, USA |
Very good flow and vividness I could really get into this poem. But hey,some times I have found it is better to walk that road alone. Not all the time but if you take a break and walk alone you find you get down it faster. Dont get me wrong you should pick up some traveling buddies on the way. As for being lonely and alone, A lot of people out there are. I know if it weren't for my son I would feel even worse then you might. But keep your chin up. Because there is ALWAYS a light at the end of the tunnel... however long it may be. I like your work and I am glad you like mine. Keep up the good work. Love is like a Rose; it always dies - Britney Miller |
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nina1522 Member
since 2009-02-14
Posts 189 |
i just wanted you to know how greatful i am for you telling me about this site. so THANK YOU cierra |
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turtle Senior Member
since 2009-01-23
Posts 548Harbor |
Hi, pen&paper, I hear you're new around these parts (CA) and I'm happy to see ya.  This is a lovely poem p&p and I can see right into your sweet heart. I would like to critique your poem by answering it in a poem from me to you. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Voices Insight becomes the chorus of Trials long traversed upon this trail. Though many I'll not rise above, I've often learned from my travail. What, therefore, does its purpose serve, This knowing voice that comes of yore? These words that dance on quill and curve, In rhythms past, from yonder shore. These voices of reflected light, In dusty glows of cheval glass, Lift fancy dreams to fluttered heights And brings me back to fleeting past. A specter drifts on mists of time To echo lulling wisps of rhyme ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ......Now. Go read a book!  |
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pen&paper Senior Member
since 2006-06-06
Posts 513 |
Turtle, that was amazing...so vivid. I loved the last line...you paint such beautiful pictures with your words. You're welcome, Nina. |
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turtle Senior Member
since 2009-01-23
Posts 548Harbor |
Hi pen, You're back? How ya doing up in "teen"? Is moonbeam helping you out? |
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stacylynn418 Junior Member
since 2009-03-06
Posts 40new york |
I really like how nicely this poem flows, and you did a really nice job of making the mood of the poem clear. |
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pandabear Junior Member
since 2009-03-08
Posts 36 |
I like this poem alot I like how the words all worked together and how it makes a lot of sence |
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