Critical Analysis #2 |
First critique post: Cease Fire (I love you!) |
Greeneyes7 Junior Member
since 2001-11-05
Posts 16Illinois |
First post to be critiqued. This isn't my normal style because I'm not normally a rhyming type but this came out so quickly I was wanting some critiques. Thanks Agree to disagree and let it be insults flying around angry voices sound What resolutions will come assuming there are some I'm not willing to fight until I lose all sight of the reason I fell for you and the reason that you fell too Agree to disagree please let it be I love you too much to fight Let's stop fighting for tonight. Life is what you make it. Live each day as if it was your last. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Typically rhyme isn't enough as a writing tool and needs to be accompanied by meter... this is what they told me years ago... and since i couldn't get any meter right, i just started writing free verse... Having said this, I would bow out and leave the floor (so to speak) to the experts Regards Sudhir |
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rainingwithsun Junior Member
since 2004-05-06
Posts 19Toledo, Ohio USA |
I must agree, the meter is off some but what a neat write. It almost made me laugh as I have kinda felt this way myself during an argument! Wish I had this poem at the time, I would have just shown it to her and I think all hostilities would have ended! |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Should have been on a card when I was married, to hand him Critique is on the way - I want to see how this one would be done myself Lauren. |
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