»
Archives
»
Critical Analysis #2
»
Glass & Stone
| Critical Analysis #2 |
|
Glass & Stone |
|
|
b.costen Member
since 2003-11-02
Posts 107ontario, CAN |
glass or stone both so easily thrown yet as one shatters the other bounces and rolls home to its garble garden of rock and earth of sand and harden but neither have seen more a matching clink than the sound of a glass placed softly to a stony rink perhaps you haven’t read but the story as it goes has sometimes been said to say that stone was to glass well met, well suited, and at a time her lover’s lass but now sand parts rather fast whenever a rock is flung dust, having broken asunder has stolen the rib and lung from her grey granite other later finding its home in a glass who is well met by the ring of a smooth merry tone when reunited they sing and glass kisses stone then sand is left wondering to why bother leave and spend time alone while the tail of the tale ends as begins i mean more or less a stone is a stone --- I tried this out in the open poetry, people there seemed to like it (I know, hardly a good system of qualification), but I thought I'd try it out here too... [This message has been edited by b.costen (12-23-2003 03:08 PM).] |
||
| © Copyright 2003 ben costen - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
wintertao Member
since 2003-11-17
Posts 366Okaloosa Island, FL |
OK this is my opinion...I likes it. I think a few of the lines could be cut and not lose anything. |
||
|
Yejun Junior Member
since 2007-11-21
Posts 49 |
This has a charming roll to it. Bumb! |
||
|
oceanvu2 Senior Member
since 2007-02-24
Posts 1066Santa Monica, California, USA |
Yejun: A stone is a stone Which can be overturned. Nonsense makes non-sense From unlearned and learned. A word is a word With multiple usage. I'd paste on a smiley But I don't have the mucilage. Overturn: 6. change radically; "E-mail revolutionized communication in academe" [syn: revolutionize). The poem is grand, The point is moot. OK, I'll stop being cute. Jim Except I can't resist: "The rock must slide past the hog line and stay in the house to be counted as a point." From the Rules of Curling. Nothing to do with rock in poem above, but much to do with the use of words. |
||
|
chopsticks Senior Member
since 2007-10-02
Posts 888The US, |
There once was this dear lass from Korea. She would bump anything she thought gala. And bumped them she did. At the blink of a lid. Would we like it if she kept them sub rosa ? [This message has been edited by chopsticks (12-05-2007 01:38 PM).] |
||
|
Yejun Junior Member
since 2007-11-21
Posts 49 |
Two oldsters are teasing a trickster Forgetting that he's just a Mr. But rules must be heeded So kiss my deleted And don't say these things as a Pipster.  |
||
|
TomMark Member Elite
since 2007-07-27
Posts 2133LA,CA |
why nobody commnets on grammar of this poem? |
||
|
chopsticks Senior Member
since 2007-10-02
Posts 888The US, |
“ why nobody commnets on grammar of this poem? “ Tom, we are having to much fun to worry about the grammar. Yejun, you told this oldster off good, I think I just fouled my drawers. TAXI |
||
|
TomMark Member Elite
since 2007-07-27
Posts 2133LA,CA |
Chops, are we asked to be serious on CA by Sir Brad? |
||
|
Yejun Junior Member
since 2007-11-21
Posts 49 |
If nothing is wrong with writing in verse, These comments in view can't be the reverse. Let us rejoice Like a Pound or a Joyce, Who sometimes wrote with no reason or purpose. |
||
|
chopsticks Senior Member
since 2007-10-02
Posts 888The US, |
Tom, this poet has already said that this is the style he prefers . I do think we should follow Brad’s whishes, like the minor god he is , so B. Costen please try to do a little better with your grammar and maybe a capital ever once and a while. Would it cramp your style to use a period now and then. TAXI, |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
