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Boxes- not really a haiku yet?
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Boxes- not really a haiku yet? |
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coyote Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077 |
"Boxes" We don’t talk as much these days My sweet Love and I She has her television I have my cyber places We should break this bond To boxes of distraction [This message has been edited by coyote (edited 03-31-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 coyote - All Rights Reserved | |||
Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
This happens, but as long as one neither is unhappy, it works. Joyce |
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coyote Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077 |
5-7-5 is hard. 7-5-7 is easier. I liked the theme and wrote it backwards.  And happy they are, Joyce. Thanks. "The poet is the priest of the invisible." |
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kcsgrandma Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522Presque Isle, ME |
So you invent your own form, and it works. They are distracting, these boxes. Please don't anyone take mine away though!To love another person is to see the face of God. |
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coyote Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077 |
Thanks, Marilyn. I hope they don't either. We would miss your company. Glad you think it works. "The only thing new in the world, is the history we don't know." |
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wordancer Senior Member
since 2000-07-30
Posts 809VA |
Coyote, true thoughts on how we can get tied up in our boxes of distraction, I really like the concept behind this one. Great that you are looking at the haiku form, you will find that you will really enjoy it and they are quite addicting.  BTW the correct form for using the Americanized form of haiku is the 5,7,5 format. A lot of Americans who write haiku follow the traditional Japanese format, three lines consisting of 5,7,5 syllables respectively. But in the Japanese language it is not syllables that are counted, but sound symbols, which in reality makes the American haiku a bit too long. And actually Japanese poets do not count syllables, they count onji which means sound symbols and refers to one of the phonetic characters used in writing Japanese phonetic script. Approximately 12 English syllables best duplicates the length of Japanese haiku in the traditional form of 17 onji. Bill Higginson goes into detail about this in his: The Haiku Handbook, Chapter 8, The Form of Haiku. BTW: His handbook is a superior reference source for haiku. The Haiku Handbook, How to Write, Share, and Teach Haiku, by William J. Higginson, with Penny Harter; First Kodansha International, 1989 (No, I don't get a kickback from him, LOL. He is considered one of the best haiku experts in the world, and I'm a great admirer of his.) Guess, I'm saying haiku does not have to follow the strict 5,7,5 syllable count that we have fallen into thinking that it is the only rule for haiku. I, personally, started with it a couple of years ago and still use it sometimes. There are many great haiku in this format. With this in mind, I don't feel syllable count (and I don't count syllables any more as a rule) is as important as getting the haiku to be effective and saying exactly what you want to say in it, capturing that "ah-ha" moment, in other words, in a short concise thought. And do bear in mind there are other criteria that makes a haiku, beside the syllable count. It just depends how deep into the form you want to go. Here is a link to a really nice self-study haiku site. In the Moonlight a Worm Also a link to the haiku section of the dmoz search engine which only gives quality sites that have been screened. Wonderful Haiku Sites -wordancer |
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coyote Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077 |
Thanks, wordancer. I will check this out, ASAP! I do enjoy laconic expression. I have also found that what is beautiful in another language, is often difficult to translate into our own. Latin and Greek come to mind. Do you read Japanese? "The only thing new in the world, is the history we don't know." |
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wordancer Senior Member
since 2000-07-30
Posts 809VA |
No, I don’t read Japanese, although I wish I did…hum, another item to put in my book of things to do. Now, if you really do get into haiku or are just interested I can give you a reading list. (or anyone else that that wants it) There is one book that is called Basho and his Interpreters, Selected Hokku with Commentary; Compiled, Translated, and with an Introduction by Makoto Ueda. Stanford University Press, 1992, that was highly recommended to me for its quality translations and commentaries. The haiku are presented in Japanese, with a literal translation and a refined English translation, quite interesting reading. Anyway the sites I gave you will keep you quite busy for sometime. . .do remember to come up for air if you get sucked in.  -wordancer [This message has been edited by wordancer (edited 03-31-2001).] |
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2dalimit Member Elite
since 2000-02-08
Posts 2228Mississippi coast |
Each have an On and an Off Do things together Melton |
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coyote Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077 |
Thanks, Melton. Good advice. "The only thing new in the world, is the history we don't know." |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Nicely done......I liked it.  |
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coyote Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077 |
Thanks, Dopey. For stoppin' by. Welcome back to the Pub. "The only thing new in the world, is the history we don't know." |
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