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The Seven Deadly Sins ( Haiku )
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The Seven Deadly Sins ( Haiku ) |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven 
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The Seven Deadly Sins Pride Lovely winter snow Metaphoric purity Dirt is still beneath Greed Spring brings forth beauty For each of us to behold Less is seen each year Envy Children love the snow More than a warm summer day The sun smiles and shines Anger Vibrant fall colors Flow down from each mountain peak Until cross winds come Lust I have no season No lovers fires in the spring I consume year round Gluttony Winter wanted more And so stayed on into Spring Flowers pay the cost Sloth Seeds were sewn in Spring Idle eyes watched as they grew Who will harvest what? |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jamie Patterson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Dear Jamie, you have created excellent Haiku's my friend, you have captured the Seven Deadly Sins perfectly. Loved every single one Great work dear  Maree p.s - it is great to read you again "If my words could blanket the skies and fill every corner and crevice of this earth, still this wouldn't be enough" "Maree Russo" |
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Suzanne Arlene Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 377Ontario, Canada |
They were so good . I enjoyed them all. It has been snowing today.Big fluffy snow.I guess i enjoyed envy the best. Suzanne |
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wordancer Senior Member
since 2000-07-30
Posts 809VA |
Each sin, perfectly captured...excuse me while I go and take another look at the layer meanings that are there. "Come...dance with me, in my world of words." |
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shira Member
since 2000-12-12
Posts 88Hamburg, PA |
These haiku are lovely - very nice metaphors... I liked them. |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Jamie....loving the lust lol these are great...but I think Lust was especially well done my friend... HUGS nice to read you again... K |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
This was one of those WOW reads. Nothing else to say but a WOW  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them! |
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pegasus111 Member Elite
since 2000-07-27
Posts 2219ocala, fl, usa |
these are excellent..haven't read your work before..looking forward to more. the woods are lovely, dark, and deep, but I have promises to keep, and many miles to go before I sleep...Frost |
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kcsgrandma Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522Presque Isle, ME |
Very well done! I don't think I can pick out a favorite. To love another person is to see the face of God. - Les Miserables Marilyn |
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Dennis L. White Senior Member
since 2000-02-17
Posts 1463Michigan, U.S.A. |
Prometheus, Brilliant collection of haiku and SO creative to frame them this way! Dennis :^) Moonbeams radiate When the veiling cloud has passed Playful shadows dance Dennis L. White :^) |
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Moon Dust
since 1999-06-11
Posts 2177Skelmersdale, UK |
I loved these esspecially the way you compared them to nature Life has got to chnage, Nothing stays the same, Soon it will be time, For me to move on. |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
i ditto the rest..its certainly a pleasure to read such unique work... i loved this line lots:Less is seen each year...expresses lots in few words...  |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
Wow - very clever and well written! I loved these Take care, Melissa The beauty of poetry gives my soul wings to fly free within dreams |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
I thank you all for the kind and most generous comments. Merry Christmas Everyone. |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
oops- double post [This message has been edited by Prometheus (edited 12-23-2000).] |
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ellie LeJeune Member Elite
since 2000-01-10
Posts 4156King of Prussia, PA USA |
Beautiful Haiku wrappped in deep, thought provoking analogy....ingenious! Ellie Belief is a truth held in the mind; faith is a fire in the heart. Joseph Fort Newton |
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2dalimit Member Elite
since 2000-02-08
Posts 2228Mississippi coast |
Congratulations. This is one of the best Haikus I have ever read. I am truly humbled. Melton |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
ellie and Melton- Careful, you may make me have to go out and buy bigger hats. Thanks so much. Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Wonderful sir!!! These are great..seems that Haikus are a specialty of yours..and they are a special treat for us!  |
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CitiZen-One Member
since 2000-09-22
Posts 84New Mexico |
Prometheus is the god of fore-sight, who could see into the future. His vision was precient. You have reflected in the fire of his soul, by bringing forth the wisdom of the seasons pouring out from those 7 deadly sins. |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
These are excellent Prometheus ! |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Sharon, Citizen, Munda  I am so glad you found it to your liking. Thanks.--jamieJamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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JOY 14 Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419Wisconsin USA |
You really captured the sins in nature. Great job. Joy |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
bumping this up so that i can read this again later... |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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