Open Poetry #4 |
Unshaped |
Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Words bring the breath from my breast and exhume my deathly memory I thought I’d laid you to rest will you not let me wilt? and find proverbial Peace (drive a stake through another’s coffin lid) bury me in fresh life carry yourself to your own grave and leave me just an autumn leaf trying to blow your words torture the wound of our demise so blind are you to any but yourself you do not see living again… this tired leaf fallen from my unshaped tree and I sigh… remembering 19.12.99 |
||
© Copyright 1999 Kamla Mahony - All Rights Reserved | |||
caroline Senior Member
since 1999-08-16
Posts 1218http://members.xoom.com/belladona123/index.htm |
Sad, powerful, and filled with your constant excellence, my friend. (((hugs))) It's not the love you fear, but the fall from the height~Edwin McCain |
||
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
A bittersweet feel this has, indeed..... |
||
hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Whew...Severn, this is an extreamly powerful and well written poem. As Nan says, it's truly bittersweet and your emotions shine clear in it. Memories often die hard my friend |
||
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Let your memories nourish your strength as you do in this poem and you will be free. You are so good Kamla with those words. |
||
DreamEvil Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396 |
Kamla you seem to have an affinity for the double helix in your work. It shows prominently in your verse my friend. 'Tis of course an awesome piece of work. Now and forever, my heart hears ~one voice~. DreamEvil© ------------------------------------------------------- "Either kill me or take me as I am, because I'll be damned if I ever change..." Count Donatien Alphonse Francois de Sade (Marquis de Sade) |
||
Seaangel Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 167Auckland, New Zealand |
Ditto, ditto. A lot of moving imagery in this, Severn, and a strong thread of thought. |
||
Seaangel Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 167Auckland, New Zealand |
Forgot...HUGS!! [This message has been edited by Seaangel (edited 12-19-1999).] |
||
Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Thanks everyone - rather a depressing thought of an hour only - not to be taken too seriously - by anyone. K |
||
Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Gotcha. |
||
Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Good. |
||
Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Severn, Lovely poem Gotcha Liz |
||
Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
Wow...powerful indeed! Big Hugs my friend...... A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extraordinaire! Shannon |
||
lostboy Member
since 1999-11-21
Posts 275New Hampshire, USA |
Severn, everyone's already about summed it up, very powerful indeed! Loved the wording and phrasing. |
||
Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Nothing in life worse than a memory that just won't go away, I know. ((HUGS)) Your words ring strong and true, beautifully done. Michael |
||
poetFemmeFatale Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646Arkansas |
Oh Severn....this just makes me hurt inside for you - I do not wish this sadness on anyone as wonderful as you he...Memories die hard, as someone else above already said. Indeed, some never die - I say that, from experience......Try not to be bitter, instead call it an experience to add to your collection of loving memories.....You are so young & have so much ahead of you to look forward to! Chin up lass!!! - - - If I can just touch you once, then I feel I have accomplished what I am called to do...- - pFF |
||
Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Severn - We all need the sighs of sweet remembering to remind us ... that we are more for the experience. Your leaf blows so gracefully. I see it dancing in the wind. Swirling you around, shaping you for what's to come not for what has been. Smile, little one. I love you. ~Marge~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
||
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Severn, Your poem says more between the lines, then anyone can read. You have my love and any support you need *L* Sy |
||
samsonheart Member
since 1999-12-20
Posts 72Missouri rez. |
Powerful poem, severn, your emotions shine through. samsonheart |
||
Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Caroline - thankyou. Many hugs returned. Nan - got any sugar? Ruth - Martie - that is fantastic advice and I appreciate it, my friend. Scott - it is perhaps through my search for emphasis that this occurs. Thankyou dark one. Sea - hey, they were nice hugs, house sister! Chris - LOL Lizzy - smiles *S* - Thankyou sweet one. LB - thankyou! Michael - yes. many thanks, my friend. Gen - you are a sweetie, you know? Sometimes we must give reign to the hurt or it will be swallowed and perhaps become poisonous. Thankyou... Marge(y) - I love you too...thankyou... Sy - that is just wonderful dear friend. Samsomheart - why thankyou... K |
||
andy Junior Member
since 1999-12-16
Posts 17 |
HUGS and a Merry Christmas for my poet-of-a-friend, Severn ! |
||
Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
Very good poem severn. |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |