Open Poetry #4 |
Rare Journey into Free Verse |
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
The blow came from nowhere unexpected unwarranted undeserved I yelped in surprise jumped back found shelter curled into a tiny ball hid Now you call again smiling entreating hand extended treat offered enticing I will come to you...but slinking crouched muscles tensed head bowed eyes on hands warily After a time I will lick love wag fetch But I will not lie down roll over And I will never expose my belly |
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© Copyright 1999 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Wow! You can even write free verse! This is excellent! I am impressed! Your talent is truly diverse! Denise |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Balladeer I just had a good laugh! This is wonderful! You should do this more often! Liz |
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sraet Junior Member
since 1999-08-04
Posts 31 |
Silly as this may be...I was saving my "50th" post (finally, no longer a "new member") for something I've been working on. However, this is so very fine (copacetic, I believe) that I just couldn't help myself. As much as I love your rhyme, I'd love to see more of this from you! |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Balladeer - This is just beautiful and well understood. Maybe free verse shouldn't be so rare to you. I've seen this puppy ! This is Be Kind To Animals day. Come here, boy. My heart has a 'no-kill' policy. Love ~Marge~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Applauds very loudly. Ah, not only free verse, but Good free verse |
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Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
A poem that is both sad and humorous all in one.....you are amazing Sir A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extraordinaire! Shannon |
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sandgrain Member Elite
since 1999-09-21
Posts 3662Sycamore, IL, USA |
What a marvelous teacher you are! If only old dogs like me could learn all these new tricks! Free verse was never greatly appreciated by me, but this forum is changing my outlook, especially reading any of your works...they're great in any form. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Denise....I wish I could but, compared to Severn or Martie, I am but a dabbler....but thank you Elizabeth....glad I made you smile. Sraet...I am honored to catapult you into member status. Welcome, MEMBER! Marge....for you, I would eliminate my " no roll over policy"! I could even learn to sit and beg! Hoot..From you, I am honored by the compliment. Thank you. Pepper...Thank you SO much. You are pretty amazing yourself! a sandgrain...BIG smile on my face from your kind words! Thank you. [This message has been edited by Balladeer (edited 12-18-1999).] |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
An unexpected treat here Mr. Deer! I find it well worth the stop! LOL and funny too! But what's that about "never say never?" |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Balladeer, You write well in any form. Thanks for the laugh. |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
This is great, Balladeer. I know how it feels venturing into the "free verse" realm. I just can't make myself feel comfortable there, but his shined...caught me completely off guard with the ending. Michael |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
I like! I like! I like! More? (Hehehe - another converted... ) |
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Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
Well done my friend. Free verse suits you well. I do not like the form myself and rarely venture into it. Kudo's. |
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caroline Senior Member
since 1999-08-16
Posts 1218http://members.xoom.com/belladona123/index.htm |
Oh DO visit the world of free verse more often! It likes you This is great! It's not the love you fear, but the fall from the height~Edwin McCain |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Hey - You..... Get back over here.... Sing me a villanelle..... |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
This was great Balladeer, but I think that anything from your pen would be--time for a short story now, then the novel--and thanks for the compliment earlier. In the dew of little things, the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. (ee cummings) |
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John Yaws Senior Member
since 1999-10-09
Posts 860Texas |
Ouch! Nothing funny about this, Balladeer. Been there, done that, got the shirt. well written my friend. |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
Whatever you put your pen to, it comes out great. btw sandgrain is my mom. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Thank you all for my feeble attempt at the free verse arena. You're right, Gunslinger. There's not. Hey, Nan! I'm still at the poetry party (they had a computer upstairs hehe) and I've got 8 new members ready to sign up. They love the site! |
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Iloveit Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 1121NM |
yep, really good stuff....oh and the poem is good too *g*....no really great poem, you say so much, whether you write a poetic story, or choose a few select words....you always get your point across....hugs [This message has been edited by Iloveit (edited 12-20-1999).] |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Such a journey shouldn't be rare! (the format, 'Deer one... not the pain! *G*) Well done! |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
You should journey more into this territory my friend!! Excellent work. . . That which gives light must endure burning --Victor Frankl |
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RobertB Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104Champaign, IL |
WELCOME my friend to the world of free verse. Now that didn't hurt toooooo bad did it??? Robert } if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming. |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
It is a dog's life... well leashed! |
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