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Open Poetry #4
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Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

0 posted 1999-12-12 05:12 PM


              Answers

A pall of innocence waits in hiding,
Waiting the symbol of sole permit.
Waits in the shadows always savoring,
Each day and night awaits commit.

It walks in the mist,
Insists on the light,
Prays and focuses,
With all its might.

For the visions of reason to point the way.
To hear an answer for something to say.
A right or a wrong all the madness in view.
To sooth the decisions it has to think through.

So it stands in mock,
Pretends its a rock.
Says, it's in stone,
In myself alone.

So the pall of innocents goes back in hiding
Goes back in the shadows, back to abiding.


© Copyright 1999 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved
Eboni
Junior Member
since 1999-12-11
Posts 17
Texas
1 posted 1999-12-12 05:20 PM


THAT IS A REALLY NEAT POEM!

 Eboni Banks

Femme's Father
Member
since 1999-10-30
Posts 58
Carrollton, TX, USA
2 posted 1999-12-12 05:57 PM


This is deep.. If it is relating to innocence or shyness, I can get the meaning after reading twice slowly. I like thoughts that are hidden in parables like this. It is a gift that is more rare and has an intrigueing mysteriousness about it! It challenges my mind to dive deeper into the realm of deciphering and seeking the thoughts of the person sharing. Jesus used this type of structure in the Bible, ie ..He
spoke not unto them except in parables...
like very much...may we have more?
James David




 A man's heart often cannot see the light - because of the darkness of it's own motives.... - James David

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

3 posted 1999-12-12 06:19 PM


Does this is some way relate to your other poem 'The Rock'?
I like this very much - though it teases my mind (but that is a good thing!)

I really like the structure - long and short verses.

Well done again, Sy.

K

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
4 posted 1999-12-12 07:28 PM


Ebonie,
Well I try to be as neat as I can.
Only fooling, thank you for the read.
Femme's Father,
I am almost in shock you recognized the parable effect. I usually feel like I'm
writing to myself. The people here are kind and good and I enjoy reading and writing with them. Your analysis was correct, thank you for the read and comment.
Severn,
you are ver astute. *L*

Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871
Minnesota
5 posted 1999-12-12 08:52 PM


Very deep, Seymour.
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

6 posted 1999-12-12 09:01 PM


Very deep. You are a person in touch with the inner self. Great job, Seymour!

 Denise



hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
7 posted 1999-12-12 09:14 PM


Deep Seymore, but I do like this  
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
8 posted 1999-12-13 01:19 PM


Elizabeth,
As long as you can swim it's not to deep.
Denise,
Thanks for the great,
I think your great too.
Hoot,
Glad you like, *L*

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
9 posted 1999-12-13 01:34 PM


Sy,
  This is a poem that is relevant to me, and so well written. Interesting verse.
Liz

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
10 posted 1999-12-13 03:37 PM


Excellent Seymour. . . wish I could begin the philosophical debate. . .



 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl



Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
11 posted 1999-12-13 05:11 PM


Well Seymour, I have read this several times and am enthralled by it--the meaning simmers before me then slithers away.  

 In the dew of little things,
the heart finds its morning
and is refreshed.
(ee cummings)

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
12 posted 1999-12-13 06:18 PM


Elizabeth,
Sometimes a parables aim
Is to drive you insane.
I missed you Liz
and miss your beautiful poetry.
*L* Sy
Sven,
I thank you for the wonderful comment.
Martie,
Didn't mean to send a snake to play,
But a parable can effect you that way.
*L* Sy "Enthralled," that's a five dollar
word, thank you much.

[This message has been edited by Seymour Tabin (edited 12-13-1999).]

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
13 posted 1999-12-13 07:33 PM


Sy
Insane , perhaps, I have gone
But I still know the right from wrong
My madness is uncomparable
But please don't blame it on the parable!
Liz

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