Galaxies Of Self Terza Rima

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Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

0 posted 2002-11-20 06:05 AM

Galaxies Of Self

Carry me on the winds of tomorrow
leave behind me a haunted; tear stained plight
freeing dreams, filled with yesterdays sorrow.

Dance me through the stars in beauty of night
erase the harbored pain of my memoirs
keep me entranced, by magic of twilight.

The secret of me lies within the stars
faded light, lavished in Luna's caress,
powers healing the deeply hidden scars.

Fly me through galaxies of happiness
let stardust brighten the darkest of shell
where even broken spirits can regress.

Hold me in mystical moments of spell
when memories suffered become past things
now residing, love and laughter to dwell.

Carry me on flight of eternal wings.
Carry me on the journeys that life brings.

"When we're torn apart,
shattered and scarred,
love has the grace to save us"
Saints and Angels as sung by Sarah Evans

Munda
Member Elite

since 1999-10-08

Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands

1 posted 2002-11-20 06:02 PM

Sigh... I love the theme and the imagery you used. Didn't I predict we were in for a treat? A great write from a Gentle Spirit.

Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant

since 2001-05-07

Posts 5182
Netherlands

2 posted 2002-11-20 08:33 PM

Just beautiful

Titia

Like scattered leaves...my words will flow

Bridget Shenachie
Senior Member

since 2002-01-23

Posts 1056
Kansas USA

3 posted 2002-11-20 09:40 PM

Hi Gentle Spirit!

Love your beautiful thoughts for transcending sorrow. I'm floating on the inspiration of your gentle spirit.

Thanks for sharing.

Shenachie

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

4 posted 2002-11-20 09:46 PM

Hey kidlet, you already know how I feel about this one

but I thought I should come by and let the rest of the folks know that I think you tackled this very well, even though you only THOUGHT you could not do it....

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

5 posted 2002-11-21 06:09 AM

Munda, thanks so much. This is definately one to be in class for!

Thanks Titia, I really appreciate it.

Bridget I am glad you found inspiration in this. Whew.......what a Challenge.

Yes Karilea, thanks. It wasn't so much I didn't think that I could write one,
I just didn't think that I could re-write this one to make it correct.......
rhyme scheme..........

*GROANS*
In some ways this reminded me of a Terzanelle which is also sooooo
much fun to write if you have never written one.
Now that I know the correct way to write one of these maybe I
will get brave enough to try another. Thanks for the help!!

Nan

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-20

Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

6 posted 2002-11-24 08:34 AM

This is a wonderfully upbeat poem... An inspiration for me to kick back and relax a bit (more anyway)..

You've got a nicely developed theme for sure.

Your rhyme scheme is nicely intact, and you've got a consistent syllable count. I can't discern a distinct meter, but I don't recall that being a mandatory point.

This is a fine piece of work, Gentle one...

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

7 posted 2002-11-24 12:26 PM

Nan this might sound like a dumb question...(I know....I know......there are no dumb questions....) but I was wondering if you could explain a bit more what exactly meter is, or provide a link that might explain it?
I just figured out the rhyme scheme thing with help from Kari, and syllable count is easy, but I'm not positive I know exactly what "meter" is. Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks much!!

I know that you can 'read' me
but can you 'hear' "me"?

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