Poetry Workshop |
Senryus by Max |
Prairie Inkwells Junior Member
since 2002-02-04
Posts 13Kansas |
Secrets of O'Dool Irishman playing the fool Glory oft refined By reading a book How to become a rebel Transposing techniques False beliefs belies Ideals they are striving for I'm a conformist ~*~ These are by Max.He would like any input you are willing to share.Thank you! |
||
© Copyright 2002 Prairie Inkwells - All Rights Reserved | |||
Bridget Shenachie Senior Member
since 2002-01-23
Posts 1056Kansas USA |
Hi Max! Isn't O'Dool's a non-alcoholic beer? Or do they also make alcoholic brews, too? Pleading ignorance here. I think Guinness would be more to the taste of an Irish conformist if you consider alcoholism an Irish tradition. Your senryu's were very thought provoking. I was glad to read your posting in the workshop. Shenachie |
||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Max, I know how you have been working on Senryus and Haikus. You've come a long way! |
||
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Hey Max... These are super senyru... The only guidelines are the syllable/line counts, as haiku are by nature - about nature... I would only suggest that in this senyru Ideals they are striving for I'm a conformist For the purposes of agreement, I would change the first line to read Nice work, m'friend.. |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |