You're my bestest of bestest dear friend

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Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant

since 2001-05-07

Posts 5182
Netherlands

0 posted 2002-06-24 08:32 PM

I tried my best to write an anapestic trimeter (I think) and I wrote this for Balladeer

I would want you to know that I'm glad
With the time we together here had
But I don't want to leave you so soon
Come lets walk, there's a beautiful moon

And I'll tell you some tales of my life
There are lots, but I'm telling you five
You're the best and that will be the first
And the second, I'm dying of thirst

So let's sit here while sipping some wine
Under moonlight this should be quite fine
And the third tale I'll tell you right here
I want cheese to my wine Balladeer

Now you're laughing but I laugh the most
You sure teached me a lot, I say Proost
But you know that I like to learn more
I won't quit and that's tale number four

And I know you will write me a song
When I'm using the grammar so wrong
Number five tale is truly here meant
You're my bestest of bestest dear friend

I don't really know if I got it right this time, let me know please

Like scattered leaves...my words will flow

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

1 posted 2002-06-24 09:19 PM

LOL!!! Well, Titia, I see you haven't forgotten my wine and cheese sonnet but let me tell you....this is excellent. You took a few liberties with the English language but the form and the meter is perfection....I am impressed beyond words that someone with English as a second language could get such a difficult form down so well....WELL DONE!!!

Dr.Moose1
Member Elite

since 1999-09-05

Posts 3448
Bewilderment , USA

2 posted 2002-06-24 11:12 PM

Titia,
You've done exceptionally well with this, ( and didn't have to stumble on it like I did!)
A very enjoyable read.
Doc

Bridget Shenachie
Senior Member

since 2002-01-23

Posts 1056
Kansas USA

3 posted 2002-06-24 11:56 PM

I am always impressed with your poems, Titia, for all the reasons mentioned above, and because the thoughts and your writing convey such a warm heart and such a generous human spirit.
A toast to your friendship with Balladeer!

Shenachie

Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant

since 2001-05-07

Posts 5182
Netherlands

4 posted 2002-06-25 02:19 AM

Hi Deer, thanks sweet friend, I took notice of my few liberties with the English language and hope I changed them in the right way.

Moose, thank you, it took a lifetime to get this right, but once I got the rythm right, I could play with my feet LOL

Shenachie, thank you girl for your lovely words.

Titia

Like scattered leaves...my words will flow

SmartChick
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-09-23

Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown

5 posted 2002-06-25 10:54 AM

Well Titia! It looks to me like you have this down very good.

Not A Poet
Member Elite

since 1999-11-03

Posts 3885
Oklahoma, USA

6 posted 2002-06-28 03:12 PM

Excellent job Titia. I knew you could do it. Actually your liberties with the language were not all that noticeable. It really didn't bother me at all. It is really hard to maintain anapestic throughout but I think you have done it here.

Thanks,
Pete

Nan

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-20

Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA