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Commonalities - Triolet
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Commonalities - Triolet |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart 
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Ok folks...here's my attempt. Dig into it! Commonalities come to play But wisdom leads me on When hierarchies have their way Commonalities come to play Steadfast speakers have their say Representatives sing their song Commonalities come to play But wisdom leads me on |
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| © Copyright 2002 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Bridget Shenachie Senior Member
since 2002-01-23
Posts 1056Kansas USA |
Sunshine-- I applaud your triolet! Great subject matter! I was so impressed with your unique expression of being unique and creative in the midst of conventional wisdom. Thanks for sharing this poem, these pages, and your insights You're tops in my book! Shenachie |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
You call this an attempt? Geesh, I call this a Triolet and a good one too!  |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Yes, Munda, seriously, my first attempt. Please, tell me where I can improve. This was not easy!! As Shenachie well knows, I had to WORK on this one!!! [This message has been edited by Sunshine (02-20-2002 09:01 PM).] |
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Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
<3 You took the challenge and did it, and that is also so beauifully done. [This message has been edited by Mysteria (02-21-2002 07:34 PM).] |
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SmartChick Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081On A Journey To The Unknown |
Well, it sure looks good to me Sunshine. |
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amigo Senior Member
since 2001-10-12
Posts 520the earth school |
Karilea....i liked your words here, you call this an attempt?...to me, it's just perfection dear...  Sharon dear...i like what you say too, but to paint a pic is hard for me, i prefer triolets instead (though chiklets are the BEST)...anyway, as far as i know, this is a eight line form, with a rhyme scheme of ABaAabAB....so, the 5th & 6th lines in yours may need some small adjustment,... that's all from this novice here.... |
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Titia Geertman Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182Netherlands |
This is a good one Sunshine. Keep them coming. Titia A rose is a rose is a rose...I guess... |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Looks pretty good to me... We did'nt say anything about meter on this one, just rhyme scheme... ergo.. I'd say it's wunnerful...  |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Meter? There's got to be meter? Darn it all anyway... where's the meter reader when you need her? |
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