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Esprit (sonnet)
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Esprit (sonnet) |
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pandora Member
since 1999-07-26
Posts 184 |
thank you, nan, for letting me crash this class ~ Esprit ~ The spring cajoled the weakness of my dreams And urged my solemn attitude to flee; Equipped with only edges of extremes, I sought to wander lost toward sweet esprit. And while the earth quick crippled at my feet, I soon ignored the sterile swift decay And sanctity was minimized, complete With visions of your eyes in shades of grey. Your voice and skin illuminate a mist In distant voids not visible by eyes; And yet your presence tells me I am kissed by rhapsody relinquished with disguise. And so I wait to visualize your soul While fooling me that I am in control. (c) pandora, 5/6/2000 all rights reserved |
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| © Copyright 2000 pandora - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Gene Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935Colorado, USA |
Well, I can tell you've done this before. Excellent job on an English sonnet. I like how you treated the words 'toward' and 'visualize' as one and three syllables respectively. It makes it flow better as that's the way most people would slur the words. ~Gene |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Very beautiful sonnet Well done, Pandora I enjoyed reading it Liz |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
Very nice, Pandora! I especially liked these two lines: "I sought to wander lost toward sweet esprit. And while the earth quick crippled at my feet," warmhrt< !signature--> the poet's pen...gives to airy nothing A local habitation and a name ~ Shakespeare [This message has been edited by warmhrt (edited 05-09-2000).] |
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pandora Member
since 1999-07-26
Posts 184 |
Thank you all for reading and responding. u-gene... actually, this is my second attempt at a sonnet. Ummm... and about the syllable thing...just curious... nobody really does say "to-ward" in two syllable, do they?... plus, isn't "visualize" always 3 syllables? how else would it be pronounced? LOL.. i didn't know i was taking any liberties with those two words. Ok, now on to read all of yours! I appreciate all of your responses! |
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StarrGazer Senior Member
since 2000-03-05
Posts 679Texas |
Pandora, I can't really comment on your form since I am still struggling to accomplish this sonnet thing but this was a great read  |
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Gene Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935Colorado, USA |
to.ward -- (2 syllables) Most people pronounce it like, 'tword' vi·su·al·ize -- (4 syllables) (notice 2nd and 3rd pronunciations): 'vi-zhu-wu-"lIz, 'vi-zhu-"lIz, 'vizh-wu-"lIz |
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pandora Member
since 1999-07-26
Posts 184 |
hehe... i love things like this... American Heritage Dictionary writes the most used and accepted pronunciation first, the least used, yet still accepted, last. to0ward (tôrd, tÅrd, tõ-wôrd2) also to0wards (tôrdz, tÅrdz, tõ-wôrdz2) prep. This tells me the one syllable pronunciation is the most used and accepted.... the two syllable, the least... what gets me about this, though, is the middle pronunciation "tard"... LOL Ah knows some folks out in west virginy that are are sick and tard of drivin' up tard them thar hills when the durn snow plow ain't come through... LOL I wouldn't have even thought of that pronunciation as being valid. hehe... and I've truly never heard anybody actually SAY "To-ward" in two syllables but I'm sure they do somewhere... thanks u_gene... i love this stuff... LOL  pan |
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StarrGazer Senior Member
since 2000-03-05
Posts 679Texas |
ummm I think I actually say to-ward but I'm not sure now that that seems to be the focus of discussion LOL the tard omg too funny !!! |
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Gene Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935Colorado, USA |
And if you're from the deep South, 'oil' and 'all' are pronounced the same. [This message has been edited by u_gene (edited 05-11-2000).] |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
I say to-ward..... I do, I do!!! I also say vi-su-al-ize... yep... But you knew I would.. Know what?? I also say com-fort-a-ble.... and being born & raised 30 miles from Boston, I still pronounce my "R's".... I'm soooooooo disgusting.... Aside from that, my friend pan, I do like this sonnet.. I love the opening couplet - Spring cajoling you in your dreams is a great vision... and you wind it up well too... hehe.. thinking you're in control. Nice work, of course... but I do think that toward is two - and visualize is four syllables... hehe..  |
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