»
Main Forums
»
Poetry Workshop
»
You Say - Free Verse (Another attempt)
| Poetry Workshop |
|
You Say - Free Verse (Another attempt) |
|
|
Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
Yes, I tried again ! LOL I know it isn't very good and it has a terrible lack of imagery. I only wanted to try and "feel" free verse. Did I succeed ? You say get in touch with your inner most deepest self feel , reach out and find free verse Here I am silence within me I hear, I listen I feel Scared this is scary nothing to mould to rhyme no rhythm Write and feel free you say Free as the wind over looking a world new to me Free as a bird flying the wind going whichever way the streams take me .... Is that what it is all about ? Write as before I knew any rules ? Munda  [This message has been edited by Munda (edited 02-17-2000).] |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Munda - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
Hi Munda, I thought this was great...expressing your emotions, your fear about writing outside the structured cage of the many rules of sonnets, etc., as if you were a domesticated bird set free into the wild. I feel exactly the opposite...I feel that edginess when I attempt structured verse, like a wild bird being caged. Nice.... Kristine< !signature--> there's a hell of a good universe next door;lets go ~ e. e. cummings [This message has been edited by warmhrt (edited 02-18-2000).] |
||
|
X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
This was much much better Munda! I really felt the flow, in a couple spots you got a bit awkward, but hey even Nan can't be perfect all the time! *wink* I think you need to keep practicing!! Write another one with your eyes closed....but take a mental picture of something that stirs your soul when go to write...find one of your fav. places and close your eyes and write it as you'd describe it someone who is blind..they have to smell and feel and basically taste the description. Let the poem flow from you like water, and just FEEL. I know you'll do fine! I was impressed with this one girl!  ~X~ Vivian Greene ~It is not our circumstances that create our discontent or contentment. It is us.~ |
||
|
Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
I think this is really good, this could be the definition of free verse....I like it it doesn't always have to have imagery and be loaded with metaphors...some is just about feeling....and don't kid your self, this has just the right images to accent what you are saying [This message has been edited by Corazon (edited 02-21-2000).] |
||
|
Not A Poet Member Elite
since 1999-11-03
Posts 3885Oklahoma, USA |
Yep Munda, I have to agree. I think this pretty well describes free verse for me, or at least my apparent lack of words when I attempt to write it. I was just looking through the recent posts and discovered that I had not yet responded to yours. I meant to do so as I really identified with it right from the start. Guess I was just distracted trying to get my own homework done I really liked the last stanza "Is that what it is all about ? Write as before I knew any rules ?" A nice surprise ending. Thanks. < !signature--> Pete What terms shall I find sufficiently simple in their sublimity -- sufficiently sublime in their simplicity -- for the mere enunciation of my theme? Edgar Allan Poe [This message has been edited by Not A Poet (edited 02-22-2000).] |
||
|
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Well, Munda - I'm with you LOL - I like your format... I like your message... (hehe.. Give me back my rhyme)... The key to free verse is to use your words to create an effective picture in the mind of your reader.... Of course, I had no trouble whatsoever relating to yours in this poem...  |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
