Poetry Workshop |
An Attic Treasure |
X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
An Attic Treasure tucked away forgotten in the top of the house the leather straps aging and brittle with time the outside labeled with stickers from a 'round the world trip unopened for many decades until I happened upon it one day back in the far corner in the deep recesses of the attic gloom covered in dust and cobwebs waiting there just for me if only this traveller could speak! what tales and stories it could tell the hinges creak in protest as I delve into it's secrets a faded mothball scent tingles my nose and awakens my memory to something..... something.... forgotten and faded just like that trunk in the deep corners of my mind if only, I could recall what it is that lingers there haunting my heart a spectre from another time reminding me, of something.... from the top I unfold, an old fur coat as into it's pockets I peruse (hoping for an opera stub, or a love letter or two!) next in the pile, some pictures and a decaying four-leaf clover a few Army medals and a lady's fine hat each treasure I uncover is like a precious gift cherished and secreted by ghosts from another time deep in the bottom hidden away folded inside a lace handkerchief tied with pink ribbon faded with age lay something I knew I must see! carefully, so carefully I opened this trove fingers so nervous my heart so fast I knew I was seeing someone's fondest remembrance when at last in a faint curly scrawl I read my Great Grandmother's name on the note the postage was different on each note I found the sender the same my Great Grandfather Richard I knew these must be his wartime letters the ones he wrote during World War I to ask after the children and his Mother and the farm and to send his wife all his undying love I never read those precious letters I just put them away I gently folded the fragile lace scrap and retied the bow the best that I could I left those ghost lovers the last of their pride and packed all the treasures back in the trunk firmly I closed the heavy lid and quietly I left the lovers to their attic repose "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." ~Eleanor Roosevelt~ |
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© Copyright 2000 Heather Walters - All Rights Reserved | |||
jbouder Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash |
Angel: I suppose I'll be first (good thing considering Philip's tendency to tarnish my reputation prior to formal introductions). This is very nice and very well written. Welcome to the class, btw. Jim |
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Poertree Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359UK |
I ran out of Silvo polish a long time ago X .. he's a lost cause ... ahem .. your poem .. excellent I thought and funnily enough it did have an atmosphere about it similar to the opening of The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe .. no escape from CSL a the moment. Philip |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
I never ever thought of CS Lewis! I love him! I love that series *sigh* The Chronicles of Narnia!! Thanks for the compliments guys ~X~ "Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?!" ~Groucho Marx |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
Oh, oh, oh ! I should have read this before posting my first attempt. Now I know for sure I need another one ! Good writing X Angel |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Wow Angel, this certainly tells a tale and tells it well. The story is great, the poem moves moothly leading the reader to the final lines and making at least this reader *sigh* at the end. "firmly I closed the heavy lid and quietly I left the lovers to their attic repose" Wonderful ending. Nice job. |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
X-Angel, I thought this was done very, very well. It flowed so nicely, and the imagery was clear enough to form perceptions, both picturesque and of emotion. Well done. I, too, especially liked the ending. Kristine If I can ease one life the aching, Or cool one pain,... I shall not live in vain - Emily Dickinson |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Wow - Nice pic - You look very different in this one from the others I've seen. I guess we all do that, huh? How's the business going? Is it open yet? How're the boys? What else is new? So how's life treating you? Can you send me a slurpee thing?... I've got money - I can pay - You just have to figure out how to get it across the country without its melting. Oh - the poem... You know I love it!! Have I been avoiding that? Well far be it from me to critique YOUR work, my friend.... How's about you do mine? [This message has been edited by Nan (edited 02-12-2000).] |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
First off lemme say thanks to all the kind replies....and then answer all of Nan's questions LOL 1. as far as looking different..is that good or bad? Sheesh Nan get me wondering... (bad hair day maybe? Horse snot on my cheek?) 2. Business- Frustrating LOL 3. Not open yet 4. Straight A's!!!!! 5. Not much, just working hard! 6. Wonderful! 7. Yes, I'll send you a slurpie thingy..what flavor? We do coffee and fruit, you name it! 8. I'll come visit and bring my blender and espresso machine You just have to provide a plumber and a big electrical circuit. 9. Me critique YOU? LOL, surely you jest my dear. *hugs*< !signature--> "Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?!" ~Groucho Marx [This message has been edited by X Angel (edited 02-12-2000).] |
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Poertree Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359UK |
Hi X I had you down for a trouble-maker sittin' at the back there with ole Jim and distractin' Nancy from my CORRECT poem .. now its seems I was too hasty .. I guess if you like Narnia you can't be all bad .. lol unless of course you're sidin' with that horrid White Witch ...... who keeps pretendin' she's something she's not !!!..... just to say again though ... great poem Philip |
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