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Teen Poetry #2
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promises
| Teen Poetry #2 |
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promises |
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lostprincess New Member
since 1999-11-14
Posts 6dalton ma us |
these broken promises have become my destiny until my eyes opened to see what has been in front of me all along and to think that i've missed it promises were made but promises didn't make me my strenght may be weak but i'm the strongest i've ever been i've allowed myself to become a victim of my enviroment but now i've opened my eyes to see all that has been taken but the fee seems small for when i saw that their lies were my true destiny from the scars on my soul to the ones on my skin i let them in.... i let them in the ones who saved the weak were the ones who robbed them of their emotions so when you weren't looking i ran from the cage to be free but when i opened my eyes to see i relized that just because there aren't any walls doesn't always mean your free my destiny |
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| © Copyright 1999 lostprincess - All Rights Reserved | |||
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pharon Member
since 1999-11-13
Posts 251alabama |
very powerful!! i can't wait to hear more from you. |
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Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
You have some strong emotions in this piece. Very good use of strong words. I would like to challange you to rework this. Capitalize and punctuate. With the use those tools this could be an even more powerful piece. The way it stands the reader pauses and excentuates where they feel is right. I would love to see what you come up with. |
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