Open Poetry #3 |
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Rachel |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom ![]() |
Sweetheart - Today would have been your 25th birthday.. (it's the 29th but I don't have the heart) As the dawn of a new day began so I held you for the first time 7:30 am - Tuesday tiny hands. wrinkled face blue eyes and tufts of hair the overwhelming feeling of love banished the pain of the last 72 hours held tight in the crook of my arms I named you in my heart Rachel Tiny little bundle - mass of love my heart soared surrounding you with a shield I still remember the horror on my face the day your belly button fell off no one to tell me that would happen just you and I surviving on love learning day by day The day you crawled turning back to laugh at me such a beautiful smile such deep violet eyes full of mischief and fun if I laughed - you did if you laughed - I did if I came back after minutes away chubby little arms reached out for hugs so much we shared so little time the first time you stayed upright the shocked look on your face "mum" I didn't fall over...LOL I miss you sweetheart... ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. |
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© Copyright 1999 Cindy Jones - All Rights Reserved | |||
Iloveit Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 1121NM |
oh gosh, this is beautiful RG, the little ones are so precious....I just love the images you made me see, If I laughed -you did, if you laughed -I did....made me smile and made me cry ![]() big big hugs for you and hope your memories get easier to bear ![]() [This message has been edited by Iloveit (edited 10-27-1999).] |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap |
This is so sad ... if it is a true story, my heart goes out to you ... if not, it is written very well; either way I love this piece. Nocht ------------------ "Nunc lento sonitu dicunt, morierus" (Now as I hear this bell tolling softly for another, it says to me, "Thou must die.") |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Heartbreaking and touching. Very well written. ------------------ Denise |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
So sad, but so beautiful.. ![]() ------------------ How long after you are gone will ripples remain as evidence that you were cast into the pool? ~Isis~ (Daughter of Mystery) |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Rainbow, This is truly a beautiful piece,Brought tears to my eye's...If I laughed - you did..if you laughed - I did, I could see it all. My heart goes out to you Hon. ((((HUGS)))) ------------------ What comes from the heart goes to the heart. Samuel Coleridge |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
Thank you...I love my daughter so very much but to fill in a little history (Nocht) Rachel was conceived from rape but nonetheless she was my daughter...I placed her for adoption aged 3 because I wanted her to have what I thought at that time was important, material wealth and security, wrong decision but hindsight is wonderful...anyway, cut a long story short...I refused to interfere in her life and the love of her family (it got the better of me) until nearly 2 years ago when I had her whereabouts investigated...a few weeks before we were due to meet she was killed by a drunk driver...I often wonder what she would have thought to me but I hope she would have liked me and she certainly would have remembered the hugs, I'm sure of that, well, my dreams are... It's only you and I that will remember her birthday or even her existence...hence my having no heart... ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. [This message has been edited by RainbowGirl (edited 10-27-1999).] |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Oh Rainbow, my heart goes out to you. You have sacrificed so much for love. I only wish you could have gotten to know the daughter she became because of your love. This is so beautifully written, yet so sad. God Bless you. Hugs ![]() Ruth |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Dear friend... I wish I could take the pain away, heal your heart, and dry your tears... Unfortunately, memories bring both tears and smiles... Rachel doesn't live just in your memories... she lives in the woman you've become and in the love you give so generously... and in the rainbows you make from the tears in your life. I know she was beautiful simply because I know she was yours... and your tribute to her is lovely. |
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Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
My heart goes out to you Rainbow.Your poem is very beautiful and very moving. You have touched me deeply...... ------------------ A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extrordinaire! |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Rainbow, I'm so sorry for your tragedy. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers. HUGS ------------------ Denise |
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Watcher666 Senior Member
since 1999-10-13
Posts 1606 |
So Beautiful.My heart goes out to you.*Hugs* ------------------ Illusion...what we see and what we do...it's all up to you. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Nothing touches like pure heart-felt emotion. Rainbow, my thoughts go out to you and your memories. |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
A soul render this is RG... I applaud your strength though...it is amazing that you can have such a big heart despite what you've had to deal with in life. A role model I think, for I only hope to have half the heart you do with half the strife. |
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JTF Member
since 1999-08-09
Posts 319France |
RG, I'm sure that walking on her rainbow, Rachel is looking at you, she is proud of you and she loves you. HUSG ![]() Quand tu regarderas le ciel, la nuit, puisque j'habiterai dans l'une d'elles, puisque je rirai dans l'une d'elles, alors ce sera pour toi comme si riaient toutes les étoiles. Tu auras, toi, des étoiles qui savent rire ! Saint-Exupéry, Le Petit Prince |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
I wish I could give voice to how I'm feeling but I think that would mean far too many rainbows.. ![]() I appreciate all your replies so much.. HUGS all ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. |
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Verma Member
since 1999-10-25
Posts 80Midlands, England |
RG - Your story moves me very much, My heart goes out to you. x |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
This is heartwrenching, Rainbow. You sure reached down deep with this one, I can feel the pain. ------------------ Michael Anderson Is all that we see or seem but a dream within a dream? |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
I just wanted to apologise for the brief reply this morning, to be honest I was taken back...the warmth that comes across with each of your replies makes me cry and before anyone says it, yep, typical woman..*g* So thank you all for the warmth and the comfort you've given me, it really does mean a lot to me... One moist eyed Rainbow says Big HUGS ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
I've taken flight in fantasy, On a brilliant summer day. While floating on a cloud of white, My child came out to play. She's dancing on a rainbow, Sliding down a star, Twirling with her bear of brown, As beauty fills her heart. She leaps into the crimson, Rolls joyfully in blue, Bathed in golden sunlight, She hugs magenta too! Copper shimmers in her hair, As she giggles silver sounds, Blowing opalescent bubbles, While turquoise drops rain down. She prances through the purples, In many shades and tones, And dips her toe in sapphire seas, Edged in silver foam. The coloured lights surround her, And the brown bear who's her friend, 'Cause she's dancing on a rainbow, And her world feels safe again! ![]() Each time on Rachel's birthday or the anniversary of her death I've posted this poem but this year I feel I know those that will read to know me well enough to understand that I'm trying to be at peace with myself so include the only photograph I have of us...(no laughing it is 24 odd years ago).. ![]() ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
This is absolutely lovely, RG - the poem, the sentiment, and the love you express.... ![]() |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
Nan: Thanks...I don't know about anyone else but if you have reservations about a decision you made, sometimes it can haunt you but there comes a time when you have to find peace with why you made it and although you may torture yourself in years to come...we do what we do at the time because we believe that is best..and letting go is equally as hard as the original decision... Bless you Nan! HUSG ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. |
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Julie Senior Member
since 1999-08-20
Posts 739Houston, TX |
RainbowGirl: I know there are no words to take away this loss but I pray that the words spoken here warm your heart if only for a moment as a blanket on a snowy evening frost. Thank you for having the courage to share this and allowing us to comfort you today. |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Rachel's poem never fails to make me smile... and it never fails to make me want to hug her mum. *S* I KNEW she was beautiful... she couldn't have been otherwise... what a treasure that photo is... what a treasure you are, dear friend. Big hugs and much love! |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Rainbow, with the posting of your second poem, again tears come to my eyes. No words can express the empathy I have for you and your loss. It would be nice if we could take your pain away for you, but we can only be here as shoulders to lean and cry upon and a listening ear. May your fond memories of the short time you shared together outlast the painful memories and may God Bless you. Hugs ![]() Ruth |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
Julie: They do, believe me, they do! HUGS Suthern: I knew you would recognise the poem just as I'm sure Toe and JTF would..:-) I wish you weren't just my Motherhen but my real mum, you could teach her a lot but somehow I doubt she'd appreciate it...but I just love the way you're always there, for me...it constantly surprises me but I'm getting used to it ![]() I love you my friend...bless your heart! HUSG Hoot: Shoulders to cry on are not something I'm used to, I'm the strong one...I think yours would be a comforting shoulder...the mind that comes from within...he's a lucky man.. ![]() HUGS ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. [This message has been edited by RainbowGirl (edited 10-29-1999).] |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
God bless you, Rainbow, ![]() Michael |
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JTF Member
since 1999-08-09
Posts 319France |
Yep, I recognise the poem and the picture ... ![]() ![]() and I applaud Auntie's comments ... ![]() HUSG ![]() |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
Michael: Thank you.. ![]() HUGS JTF: Thank you sweetheart.. ![]() ![]() HUSG To my dearest family, some things I'd like to say. But first of all, to let you know, that I arrived okay. I'm writing this from heaven. Here I dwell with God above. Here, there's no more tears of sadness; Here is just eternal love. Please do not be unhappy just because I'm out of sight. Remember that I am with you every morning, noon and night. That day I had to leave you when my life on earth was through. God picked me up and hugged me and He said, "I welcome you. It's good to have you back again, you were missed while you were gone. As for your dearest family, They'll be here later on. There's so much that we have to do, to help our mortal man." God gave me a list of things, that he wished for me to do. And foremost on the list, was to watch and care for you. And when you lie in bed at night the day's chores put to flight. God and I are closest to you....in the middle of the night. When you think of my life on earth, and all those loving years. Because you are only human, they are bound to bring you tears. But do not be afraid to cry: it does relieve the pain. Remember there would be no flowers, unless there was some rain. I wish that I could tell you all that God has planned. But even if I told you, you wouldn't understand. But one thing is for certain, though my life on earth is o'er. I'm closer to you now, than I ever was before. There are many rocky roads ahead of you and many hills to climb; But together we can do it by taking one day at a time. It was always my philosophy and I'd like it for you too; That as you give unto the world, the world will give to you. If you can help somebody who's in sorrow and pain; Then you can say to God at night......"My day was not in vain." And now I am contented....that my life was worthwhile. Knowing as I passed along the way I made somebody smile. So if you meet somebody who is sad and feeling low; Just lend a hand to pick him up, as on your way you go. When you're walking down the street and you've got Me on your mind; I'm walking in your footsteps only half a step behind. And when it's time for you to go....from that body to be free. Remember you're not going.....you're coming here to Me. Author Unknown ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. |
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