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DreamEvil
Member Elite

since 1999-06-22

Posts 2396

0 posted 1999-06-29 11:07 PM

I read the poems of Balladeer, filled with earthy verse. I read them and want to laugh and cry
I don't know which is worse.

If I could only write verse and erotic rhyme,
Just as Poet deVine, I would you know
And use broken hearts
Just to mark the time.

Now this next set of verse,
Really should have been first,
Moonlight you see,
Inspired me with her thirst.

Darkness just flows from the tip of my pen,
an ink stain on the ebony glass of my soul.
I drink down the despair and then
Pain comes crawling back again
to make me whole

I wish I could write inspiring verse filled
with joy and mirth
but my soul has been killed
my only kindness, the cold earth.

Wordsmiths hammer their words into shape
Tailoring their words to fit.
My verse is more like emotional rape,
No one wants to feel it.

Poems inspire, lover's delight,
Passions fire grows, burning bright.
I find that I envy the verse these
Poets write.

Wordsmiths write for not only delight,
but to instill emotions in others.
My verse instills only fright
And warnings to children from their
Mothers.

But I'll keep at this rhyme
Until there comes a time
When the words of each peer that
I hold so dear
Will trip from these lips of mine.

------------------
Patience is a virtue, but virtue has never been one of my redeeming qualities.

one voice
Junior Member

since 1999-06-29

Posts 38
Billings, MT USA

1 posted 1999-06-30 01:25 AM

DreamEvil, I love this poem... as I told you before, I don't even know what to say except that it's beautiful; beautifully written and filled with emotion.

~one voice~

DreamEvil
Member Elite

since 1999-06-22

Posts 2396

2 posted 1999-06-30 02:11 AM

Thank you again for your praise, it's my only reward. Nearly. lol

Moonlight
Member

since 1999-06-25

Posts 105
Auburn, Alabama USA

3 posted 1999-06-30 02:17 AM

I like it Dreamevil,I think you are on your way to a new style. I know it can be hard to focus on "positive" things, but try focusing on neutral things in your poetry... then maybe you can gradually work into something that isn't so dark - if thats the way you want to go. Just a suggestion....

I'll look forward to more...
~m~

DreamEvil
Member Elite

since 1999-06-22

Posts 2396

4 posted 1999-06-30 02:57 AM

Thank you Moonlight. The faintest praise from my lady fair,makes me giddy, weak in the knees.
Your smallest smile keeps me
all the while and my heart
warms by degrees.

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