Open Poetry #1 |
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Balladeer's Journey Into the Birds and Bees |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
I could humbly bow, To the Poet Balladeer, But I enter this little war on words, As usual, with little fear. Obviously he's a poet, A poet extraordinaire, I would never ever try, To compete with this guy here. But I know a tale about him, And so I'll post it now. About his love for women, And the way that he learned how. Two guys and Balladeer one day, Learning the birds and bees, Went downtown to learn "the way" Of the female anatomy. Though they'd never had the chance, To explore the ways of sex, They'd pay to play in one's pants And see what popped up next. The sign read: The Mustang Ranch, A house of ill repute. So they thought that they would take a chance And see what they could do. The sign said we have ladies, For 10-15 and 20, The first guy said that maybe, Ten dollars would be plenty. He came out smiling wide, Balladeer asked what she did? He said that it was wonderful, And was smiling like a kid. He said she took some ice cream, And put it on his meat, Then she ate off every bit, And it was so very sweet. The second fella now excited, Thought fifteen would be much better, Went upstairs, then returned, And told them to the letter; She took two scoops of ice cream, and put it way "down there" Ate it off soon after, It was wonderful I swear! Well Balladeer had money, From writing poetry, Went upstairs, gave his twenty, and experienced ecstacy. He soon came down dilerious, Why he could hardly speak, He told them of his story, Of "love" he'd never dreamed. He said she took the ice cream, With whipped cream and cherry fruit, Put in on his "member" It covered all his inches "two" He said he was so excited, the way it looked and smelled, Before she could do a single thing He ate it off himself!!! [This message has been edited by Toerag (edited 08-09-99).] |
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© Copyright 1999 Toerag - All Rights Reserved | |||
WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
Sooo Baaad! haha, you two and words of war! |
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tori Senior Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 520Mechanicsville, Maryland, USA |
hahahahaha little lick um's huh? this is great... can't wait for the come back...lol Thinking in laughter is the best!! __________________________________________________________________________________________ If with pen in hand I've made you think I've not wasted one drop of ink vlh. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
So, once again, dear Toerag, you've got the whole thing wrong It wasn't just a scoop or two she placed upon the dong. She called Baskin-Robbins and, to be sure they would reach, She got all 57 kinds....and used a scoop of each. |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
There are wars between the nations That make us quake with fear But those battles aren't as fun to watch As the war that we have here. Bloodshed, bombs and battle wounds We poets try to shirk But we tune in as Toe and 'Deer Do their awesome work! Now we're not really taking sides We cheer for every score And hope our poetic warriors Will skirmish still some more! Toerag: Excellent job! *G* I didn't know Balladeer was such a contortionist! LOL. By the way... I lied. *G* Of course I take sides! LOL. What Balladeer has failed to state Is that his flavorful cover Was provided with those tiny taste spoons There wasn't room for any other! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Why, Suthern, you've desserted me. I really feel hurt. 'Cause I'm the only one who can Give you 'just desserts'. |
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Lorelei54 Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 458 |
Toe and Deer, ya'll are two cards, doing a fab job. Poor old LJA is working too hard and feeling left out...currently he sleeps like a baby..wonder why? |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
He's probably gonna wait until we exhaust ourselves and then get up and knock us silly! |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Too terrible to mention! (my condolences on the 2" Balladeer, but don't worry, it's better than nothing!) ------------------ Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll be among the stars. -Unknown- So let the sun beat down upon my face, It's warmth will dry my tears. |
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elvira Senior Member
since 1999-07-06
Posts 936California |
i haven't hear that one in a long time, Toerag ![]() |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Balladeer....Beware of LongJohn....yes, he is a dear friend...he may possibly take your side.....but he is very sneaky and clever...I have been caught in his traps quite often... Elvira...yep....the idea did come from a very old joke.....but it fit so well...since Balladeer's such an old joke.....LOL |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
You guys are too much but it's a ton of fun. |
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Dragoness Senior Member
since 1999-08-07
Posts 513 |
2 inches is all? Sounds rather small But I don't think for Balladeer I'll shed a tear at all. Well done Toe! ------------------ Set you heart free and your mind will follow. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Well, Dragoness, I must confess Two inches isn't much But, when well put, it grows a foot. Sleep well,now. Keep in touch. |
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aziza Member Elite
since 2006-07-09
Posts 2995Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy! |
This is so damned funny and you two have been writing these for 8 years???? Yep, you need to put them in a book. Alison |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Enjoyed ARCTIC WIND |
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