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grasshopper63
New Member

since 1999-08-07

Posts 1
Kingston, Jamaica

0 posted 1999-08-07 10:15 AM

Death of a Lover

Decay and rot now fill this place
Where life once did abound
Her love denied, she wanted space
To live and breath and move.

And so her soul did get its rest
She died from so much pain
She wanted peace, she wanted joy
She vowed never to love again

Her heart is cold, she loves no more
She found no one to love
Her feet are cold and very sore
She searched many days for love

Cold, beaten, numb, ashamed she lies
Alas! Her man is gone
He left her unloved, scarred to die
He didn't give a damn

She'll live again, not here, not now
She'll love somewhere, somehow
Decay and rot may now be here
But love will rise again.

Yes! Love will rise, somewhere, somehow,
She knows it in her heart
She cannot breath it out aloud
For fear he breaks her heart.

JohnDoe82
Junior Member

since 1999-08-04

Posts 42
MO, USA

1 posted 1999-08-07 10:50 AM

I think the descriptions in the first stanza are excellent. Perhaps it's just me, but the last line in each stanza seems very choopy, I guess I'm just not reading it correctly. Still, it is a very well written poem. The second to last stanza contains an excellent message, don't forget it yourself.

JohnDoe82
Junior Member

since 1999-08-04

Posts 42
MO, USA

2 posted 1999-08-07 10:51 AM

I think the descriptions in the first stanza are excellent. Perhaps it's just me, but the last line in each stanza seems very choopy, I guess I'm just not reading it correctly. Still, it is a very well written poem. The second to last stanza contains an excellent message, don't forget it yourself.

Twilight_Angel
Junior Member

since 1999-08-07

Posts 22
USA

3 posted 1999-08-07 11:49 AM

I like the message this poem delivers. It is well explained and nicely interpretted. The last stanza is very powerful!

demerara99
New Member

since 1999-08-07

Posts 1
Guyana

4 posted 1999-08-07 04:49 PM

Wow...with the right music and singer...this would make a powerful song!!!

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

5 posted 1999-08-07 09:18 PM

Nicely done...it rings true in this heart

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"Nobody has measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold" ~Zelda Fitzgerald

Dragoness
Senior Member

since 1999-08-07

Posts 513

6 posted 1999-08-07 09:31 PM

Beautifully done, And so true!!

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Set you heart free and your mind will follow.

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