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Open Poetry #1
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Your Piece of Lonely Fool
| Open Poetry #1 |
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Your Piece of Lonely Fool |
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Lucie Senior Member
since 1999-06-20
Posts 1077Houston 
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You look at me, but you don’t see that everyday a piece of me is dying in this big old house while I wait for them to let him out. The part that everyone seems to need. Is fading but you pay no heed. My screams fall on your hollow ears you can not hear me it appears. You come to me you take a part you all snatch and grab a piece of heart then walk away and leave me here drowning in my silent tears. You criticize you hypocrite but check your hands you hold a bit. Your opinion seems to say that I should stay here locked away. "Don’t let them in" you say to me. "No one cares that your lonely." I took vows to him .. I know should I stay faithful.. you think so. You listen and you sympathize then turn around and criticize. I’m opening the door again. you scream at me "Don’t let them in." Until the moment we’re alone when your opinions turn to stone. Then you reach out to snatch your part the little piece of Lucie’s heart. You listen and you think you hear you look and watch me disappear. You reach for me with gentle touch you just don’t know its not enough. I am dying can't you see for I would face the guilt in me. And you could walk away unharmed and touch another with your charm. This prison that I’m living in is closing in on me again. As I sit here and hand the tools, come snatch a piece of lonely fool. |
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| © Copyright 1999 Lucille Dobbins - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Lucie, this is a really powerful piece with more great lines than I can count. The last stanza makes it all. Very, very well done. |
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Lucie Senior Member
since 1999-06-20
Posts 1077Houston |
Thank you Balladeer, your praise means so much to me. There are many layers to this lonely fools heart. |
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Mark R. Member
since 1999-06-25
Posts 113San Francisco, CA. |
A lovely, touching piece of work. You had me reeling in emotion. I find myself wondering at times why it is that the ones that are closest to us....be the ones that cause us the greatest pains. I can't emphasize enough the brilliance of your poem. Great job, keep up the good work... |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Lucie That is hard. It is pure. I felt it in my heart, and I felt it in my conscience. You flowed, and it stands on its own. If a selection of poems about need and loss is taken from this board and published, this poem must be there. Your poem reminds me of a Statue in Central Park. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I like this, Lucy. I see this person as if she were not only talking to him, but to another as well. Good piece. ------------------ © KRJ Sunshine Words will always express our feelings true. ~~~ KRJ Look, then, into thine heart, and write ~~~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow |
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Lucie Senior Member
since 1999-06-20
Posts 1077Houston |
Thank you all for your kind replies. This poem as with the others I write give to you a piece of me. The lonely fool. |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Well written, I can really relate to this one |
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