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Unspoken Words
| Open Poetry #1 |
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Unspoken Words |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA 
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Unspoken Words She: Hey, lover! How ya doing? Just a call to say hello ( There's something I must tell you that I think you ought to know ) He: I'm doing good. Supposed to rain but otherwise I'm fine. ( It's great to hear your voice again. I wish that you were mine.) She: We've got some rain up our way, too. It shouldn't last too long. ( I have to move on with my life although I'm not too strong ) He: Here either. By tomorrow I am sure it will be gone. ( I'd love to tell you from my heart that you're the only one ) She: I have a date tomorrow night. I haven't met him yet. ( Perhaps it is a big mistake I'm destined to regret ) But Mary thinks he's real nice and Karen likes him, too. ( But I would give all that I have if it could just be you ) He: Terrific! That sounds really good. I'm very glad for you. ( I know how much you love me but it's something you must do ) Don't stumble over your big feet if he asks you to dance! ( For I am with another and we never had the chance ) She: Don't worry about MY feet, you louse! They're smaller than YOUR feet! ( Things could have been so wonderful, had we the chance to meet ) I'm told that, on the dance floor, I'm as graceful as a swan. ( But, though I hold this love for you, my life must move along ) He: Be gentle with him, babe. You know how sharp your wit can be! ( How sad the night will be, I think, for you as well as me ) And, if you play your cards right he may ask you out again. ( I love you, babe. How differently our futures could have been! ) She: Well, that's it for tonight, old pal. A million things to do. ( Please understand the pain I feel and what I'm going through ) He: Take care and have a real good time. I'm really glad for you. [This message has been edited by Balladeer (edited 07-10-99).] |
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| © Copyright 1999 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sally S. Senior Member
since 1999-06-07
Posts 847Ohio |
Oh, why do we all avoid those unspoken words? You know, I think we'd all be a lot happier if we paid them a bit more heed. |
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thursdayschild Member
since 1999-07-01
Posts 169Houston, Tx. |
I love your poem. (more than I can say) Thanks for sharing....... |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Me: This is truly inspired! I held my breath waiting for them to say what they were thinking! (This is truly inspired! I held my breath waiting for them to say what they were thinking!)  [This message has been edited by Poet deVine (edited 07-10-99).] |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
Oh, gosh, this reminds me so much of my end of phone conversations with my "someone special"-wish I could know what he thinks, if he thinks it at all... |
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elvira Senior Member
since 1999-07-06
Posts 936California |
i second Poet deVine's comments, life is all too short to leave feelings left unspoken, thank God i am a naturally out-spoken person, at least in affairs of the heart  ------------------ i never call a poem "nice" or such, for that would not be saying much |
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DreamEvil Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396 |
Excellent!! A method I had never thought of, inspiration at it's best. ------------------ I am not responsible for how you choose to interpret what I say. DreamEvil© |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
M&M, I do believe that I now have a favorite from among your masterpieces - I could even hear the "rhythm of the falling rain" as I read it. It's beautiful.... |
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Poetwheel Member
since 1999-07-07
Posts 208Canada |
This instantly became a personal favorite after the first read! Fantastic! Please sate our thirst and write a follow up to this one! Perhaps the call after the date? Perhaps he gets the nerve up & calls her back, beeping in on a call where her original date says he can't make it... Anyhoo, excellent work! PW ------------------ Poetic Wheelbarrow http://sites.netscape.net/poetwheel |
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azblond Senior Member
since 1999-07-01
Posts 637The Steamy Desert |
After everyone else has let you know how wonderful this piece is...I'm afraid there aren't many words left to say...other than I enjoyed it...and am reminded once again of how much is said in words never spoken... |
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Cinderella Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 152Arizona |
 This one made me laugh from the talent you have in unusual phrasing. So different from your others, but so fantastically written! Looking forward to more humorous postings. |
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~one voice~ Senior Member
since 1999-07-08
Posts 664Billings, MT USA |
Balladeer, how creative to use a telephone conversation... brilliant! I really enjoyed this piece. Your work has been an inspiration to me! ------------------ ~one voice~ For Myself, I live, Live intensely and am fed by life, and my value, whatever it be, is in my own kind of expression of that. *Henry James |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
How sad when we do not express those words in our hearts...I think that is where we as writers have an advantage over others....sometimes it is harder for us to not say what is on our mind than it is to say it. I have found I have to use tact at times as others do not always appreciate what I have to say Very well written! |
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amhain New Member
since 1999-07-12
Posts 1student |
Sometimes the most valuable words are the most silent ones, aren't they? |
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Alain DeLaCendres Member
since 1999-07-02
Posts 119Ohio |
Ouch...this one hit a little too close to home...Great poem though, I think this is something we all can undersand at one time or another. And those that don't understand may be called naive, but maybe we should call them blessed..... ------------------ Tout s'en va, tout passe, l'eau coule, et le couer oublie. |
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sheba57 Member
since 1999-06-27
Posts 64vincennes, in usa |
balladeer - truly a beautifully melancholy piece; my heart aches for both parties. you truly are a master, and i love reading your works. this style you used in the piece is very, very good. i do so enjoy your writing sir. sheba57 |
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ac Member
since 1999-06-17
Posts 129Cayey, PR - USA |
what a wonderful way to show all those things we never say...that in most cases, as all know, don't make a difference anyway...i loved the way you took that "everyday" conversation and dug around the words... that get lost in the faceless pleasantries shared with those that we love most... |
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ppc442 New Member
since 2002-06-20
Posts 3 |
Well, you did it...you made me cry...AGAIN. It's really been one of those days..... |
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cjohnson/poet2079 Junior Member
since 2002-07-31
Posts 35va(757) |
Balladeer, when I saw the title, I knew it would be a great poem. I love it; it is so me at this present time. ...unspoken words frozen in time, like a winter season in my mind... :crying: eyssence [This message has been edited by cjohnson/poet2079 (08-13-2002 01:17 PM).] |
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cjohnson/poet2079 Junior Member
since 2002-07-31
Posts 35va(757) |
Balladeer, when I saw the title, I knew it would be a great poem. I love it; it is so me at this present time. ...unspoken words frozen in time, like a winter season in my mind... :crying: eyssence |
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*Stubby* Member
since 2002-09-19
Posts 122 |
It brought a smile to my face Thankyou J  |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
mmmm, well...this I missed. but enjoyed...truth... |
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latearrival Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499Florida |
I loved this one, thanks for writing. marty |
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trutodaraiders Senior Member
since 2006-12-02
Posts 820CA |
This poem reminded me of memories I regret. Regret of unspoken words,and a love that went to another. I loved this poem. |
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