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My translation of Boris Paternak's "winter night"
| Open Poetry #2 |
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My translation of Boris Paternak's "winter night" |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA 
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The blizzards covered up the earth And roamed uncurbed The candle burned upon the desk The candle burned As in the summer, moths are drawn Towards the flame The pale snowflakes flown Unto the pane Upon the glass, bright snowy rings And streaks were churned The candle burned upon the desk The candle burned On the illumined ceiling, Shadows swayed A cross of arms, a cross of legs, A cross of fate Two boots fell down on the floor With crashing sound And from the crown tears of wax Dripped on the gown And nothing in the snowy mist Could be discerned The candle burned upon the desk The candle burned From the corner, a gentle breeze Onto the candle blew The flame raised wings into a cross As angels do It snowed a lot all through the month This constantly occured The candle burned upon the desk The candle burned PS: His name is "Pasternak" sorry for misspelling it in the title. ------------------ I fell in love and kept on falling [This message has been edited by Master (edited 09-07-99).] [This message has been edited by Master (edited 09-07-99).] |
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| © Copyright 1999 Andrey Kneller - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
tell me what you think |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
any1 |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Probably the lack of responses is due to people not being familiar with "winter night". Guess what? I'm not, either. I do feel that if it were simply listed a a poem of yours, it would have received many more because the poem, as it stands, is very well done. It creates a scene and has a flavor that is appealing. I like the style and the cadence. |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Probably so, but I don't want to take the credit for the work of this amazing poet. I'm glad you liked it. |
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Tim Senior Member
since 1999-06-08
Posts 1794 |
author of Dr. Zhivago? |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Yeah him! Are you familiar with his poetry? [This message has been edited by Master (edited 09-07-99).] |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
This poem in it's self is great...as far as Winter Nights...oh well, what can I say I am a novice when it comes to literature ------------------ "Nobody has measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold" ~Zelda Fitzgerald |
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traveler Member
since 1999-08-17
Posts 119 |
The essence is there ..great interpretation ... thank you |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Thank you traveler and howl! I'm surprise so few have heard of him. I'm glad you liked the poem though. ------------------ I fell in love and kept on falling |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
I've edited it a little, how is it now? |
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Tim Senior Member
since 1999-06-08
Posts 1794 |
Am I a gangster or murderer? Of what crime do I stand Condemned? I made the whole world weep At the beauty of my land. Don't read Russian, but have read Nobel Prize.... to have your life taken from you for writing such beauty... a tragedy... |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
I agree Tim... it was a tragedy... |
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