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Open Poetry #2
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*Crimson Star*
| Open Poetry #2 |
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*Crimson Star* |
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Aldo New Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2Some where in the the depths the United Sadness of America |
This is my first poem and I wanted to share it with some one and fortunately I found you!!! Crimson Star My love for you proclaimed in words Could never be out spoken, My visions lost when hopes die Now I'm lost and broken. Your distant kiss a dream so far A torturous burning lie, Lost in spite of all I see In every tear stained try. Raindrops bring relief from thirst Yearning to be free, A wondrous tree all made of stone My cold eternity. With arms out stretched palms to the sky I'll never be alone, Burning star from blinding heights Watches from his throne. [This message has been edited by Aldo (edited 09-26-1999).] |
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| © Copyright 1999 Aldo - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Lelly Shae Junior Member
since 1999-09-20
Posts 32 |
For your first poem,this is really,really good. I love the title. |
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Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
Your first work. Very nice. I have posted my first works here as well. I do not have the style of a poet. Just the depth of my soul. I have come here to learn. Poetic style is something I lack. You have done a wondeful job here. |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Welcome to Passions Aldo! As for the first try, well I hope it won't be your last! This work shows a lot of potential. I really liked the line: "Burning star from blinding heights" Welcome again! |
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DreamEvil Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396 |
Echoes of Christopher here. Welcome indeed and do present your work again. ------------------ Now and forever my heart hears ~one voice~. DreamEvil© |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Beautiful!! Welcome to Passions, looking forward to more ------------------ Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints in our heart and we are never ever the same. Thank you all for leaving footprints!! |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Very lovely, Aldo. I enjoyed this. ------------------ Denise |
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