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Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

0 posted 2000-10-07 05:02 PM


To lie disconsolate then, in shadows, is only a window into a bleak future, and thoughts rumble as to what can be changed, and what cannot.  Would steps toward improving a relationship go farther than to take the pin and prick the bubble?  Does indeed time heal all wounds, or leave them gasping for a last pump of life's blood in fading moments?  Should I wear boots to the pig-roast?

Where do the country songwriters get their lyrics, and why can't they stretch more as those who pen words for poetry's sake?  "Do, shoe, clue…" does not allow much room for emotional expansion.  What does my face look like when I'm really pondering?  Is it as old as my mother's was at this age?  When still and in repose, do the eye-wrinkles show up as much as when I smile, and heaven knows it's been said I smile too much.  Does that make me proud of my wrinkles? I've earned them…

I wonder what folks think when I end my messages with ellipses…do they know I just want to say more, and sometimes cannot express myself the way I really would like to do…

Will the chicken-salad be enough to take, or should I take more to the roast?  Will anyone feel the tension between us?  Will someone say something and will I respond in a way that by tomorrow morning I will regret?  I need to stay away from the open bar and just sip soda and keep my sanity and wit and laugh at those who sip once too much, and be glad for the wisdom of age and past youth's experience.

I believe I would often be amazed if anyone could hear the rattling around in my brain, I do believe they would call those men in white coats…I do ramble so.

Why do I go from the most serious of questions to a lighter-hearted joking with myself...

[Thoughts in a bubble bath.]



Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...KRJ



© Copyright 2000 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved
Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
1 posted 2000-10-07 06:03 PM


Would is surprise you to know - I share  share similar thoughts -? and I use " - " like you use "..."  ~G~ (a side note - I've not been to a pig roast in years - and I salivate now with the though - like you wouldn't believe - saurkraut, roast pork, corn on the cob, mashed potatoes, gravy - in quantities to gorge a gourmand  (and hopefully some decent beverages  - )
(second side note - recallin a xmas party - when I did NOT restrict my intake as I should- (I was playing piano - and I was offered a refill - I indicated 2 fingers and water - received 2 finger of water and scotch) I was BAD -- YOU DID a number on my memory as well -
Do this again ~S~

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
2 posted 2000-10-07 09:55 PM


I laughed REALLY hard at the country lyrics part!!! Too true, shoe, clue... ROFL

Cute Kari!  

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2000-10-10 08:59 AM


Bill, I will certainly try to write some more in this vein, it's very therapeutic...

Christopher, I'm glad you enjoyed.  Thank you.

Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...KRJ



jbouder
Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash
4 posted 2000-10-10 12:34 PM


Did you realize that much of your prose is iambic and anapestic (da-DUM and da-da-DUM) with occasional minor ionics (da-da-DUM-DUM).  I wanted to point this out because I think you've demonstrated the usefulness of adding a lyrical quality to prose when the subject matter calls for it.  It works for me, anyway.

Thanks for the read.  I liked it.

Jim

Sunshine
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
5 posted 2000-10-29 06:39 AM


James, yes, I DO think like that...and I certainly appreciate the time you took to come in and read...thanks!

Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...KRJ



JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
6 posted 2008-03-28 07:17 AM


This seems to be quite a long bubble bath...would the thoughts change if someone was scrubbing your back...James
Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
7 posted 2008-03-28 09:25 AM


Good grief, James...eight years ago. Sigh...

But it turned out to be a pretty good BBQ...and good grief, it probably wouldn't surprise you to know that I'm still capable of some of the same thoughts, with revisions...  

It was a surprise to find this here - I wonder now what it was you were looking for?  LOL...




Oklahoma Rose
Senior Member
since 2008-02-28
Posts 1586
Oklahoma USA
8 posted 2008-03-29 09:06 PM


You sure did have a lot of thoughts in your bubble bath.
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
9 posted 2008-03-30 06:50 PM


Hi Sunshine..."I wonder now what it was you were looking for."...oh I dunno, perhaps some scenery to go with the poetry...James
Larrysmom
Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533
Florida, USA
10 posted 2008-04-04 12:12 PM


I love the ride this piece takes you on as your thoughts go from serious, to funny, and simply practical. Your writing makes me feel the different emotions your feeling as well.

The rattling around in your brain makes for some very poetic prose. I love this piece. Thank you for sharing.

Tammy<333

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
11 posted 2008-04-04 10:51 AM


James...the camera got wet.

Rose, really, I'm a shower gal - which leads to a lot of thinking too, but a soak in a tub...well, those thoughts just seem to wrinkle up like prunes sometimes.

Tammy, thank you for being open enough to recognize the trail of emotions that disappeared as fast as the bubbles do in one's bath. I enjoy writing in this manner, and I'm glad you enjoyed it too.

Sunshine



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