»
Main Forums
»
Passions in Prose
»
The Legacy of Oakiu
| Passions in Prose |
|
The Legacy of Oakiu |
|
|
xTr3m3sT Member
since 2008-03-03
Posts 415 |
As I am walking through this hallway, I notice something strange. There is a awkward stone illuminating behind a wall of some sort, the shadow is blocking my view so I can't see very well. As I walk towards the stone my body starts to feel like somebody was showering me with small static sparks of electricity, and the closer I got the more painful the shocks became. So I walk slowly towards the stone, I can't stop walking towards it either, the stone is controlling me. My hand reaches for this unknown object and I wake up in my bed with some sort of encryption on my fingers and palms. I say to myself ''Was that just a dream?''. I know better that it wasn't a dream, this has been happening to me for three days now, and I've already seen the city of Oakiu. I walk around the city of Oakiu and I begin to soak the beauty of this wonderful city. The trees are glowing with radiance far beyond my perception and the atmosphere is so pure and clean, no pollution at all. The streets are paved on the sides with sapphire and the road is made up of a material only found in Oakiu, damaksus. Damaksus is a direct reincarnation of the beauty of the universe, so vast with properties that are still a mystery to the people of Oakiu. I walk around and see a person who was just walking into a store and I say hi and he responds, ''What ya thinkin' bout' this town here''?. I reply, ''I like this place a lot, it's very different''. In reality I just wanted to smack the guy for using that tone with me, so deep and country like, reminds me of home. He then replied ''Boy, let me tell you sumthin', there aint no kindness in this city, now you best get your raggidy ass out of mah face or I'll have to buckshot you dead''. I now realize that these people around this city are hostile and with that I answered, ''Old man, leave''. He got right in my face and slapped me, then stormed off. With a red cheek I walk to the nearest water fountain wondering when I can get back home, and look at this weird marking on my palms. I put my hand underneath this weird water, it's not like Earth's water, well, it's kinda...hmm. no, it's not. It's a liquid that resembles Earth's water but has different elemental components, instead of H2o it's H5c, don't ask me what the C means, I just got to this weird planet. I begin to wash my hands when this lady approaches me, I smile and with all the charm I can muster I say, ''Hey baby, what's up''? She looks at me and says ''I think it's more appropriate to ask for a woman's name before trying to get inside of her pants''. She's not country sounding, thank god. I tell her, ''My name is Damien, Damien...gah' I'm sorry I get nervous, Damien Page. She replies, ''My name is Hintasha Indigo''. What a snotty girl this Hintasha is. ''So, Hintasha, what brings you here?'' I say. ''Well nothing of course, I just came to this place so I can sit here and talk about random nonsense with an under educated man.'' How dare she insult me like that! ''Well, it's obvious that you are a dyke, now get out of my face.'' I say with an angry tone. Why do people around here have to be so angry? She then does an obscene jester to me and leaves. After this insane encounter with this woman I look at my hands again. The markings on my hand look like frickin' ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics with a Sci-Fi twist, and they are either tattooed on my hand, or put on by some sort of lazer. Now, I have no idea how I got these markings on my hand, all I remember is me walking to some sort of stupid ass stone, and WHAM I end up in a city where everyone has a screw lose in their heads. I walk to the nearest doctor's office that doesn't even look like a doctor's office, but more like a futuristic dome and tell the lady registering everyone, ''I need to get my hands check, now''. She looks at me funny and says ''Who da' hell do ya' think ya' talkin' to''? I think I'm talking to some tramp, but with a calm voice I say ''Sorry, I didn't mean to sound rude, but my hands are kind of, sort of, ...well-''. She interrupts me and shouts, ''WELL, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR STUPID HANDS''? How dare this woman yell at me. I reply ''Listen, you mentally incapable piece of under developed trash, I want you to get me a doctor or so help me god I will definetly rearrange your face'', -bad idea. She got out of her chair, walked around the desk, and got up in my face and says, ''C'mon, do SOMETHING, what are YOU going to do HUH''? This woman is looking for a beat down. I say ''Look at these hands, THEY ARE RUINED because of some sort of cosmic space rock that teleported me to this GOD FORSAKEN CITY, now I want you to get me a doctor to get my hand checked NOW!!'. The secretary seems to be shocked at my response and makes her way to the back of the office, then brings out a huge man that appears to be the doctor. The doctor says, ''Hello, my name is Doctor Silstin, what's your name''? I answer, ''My name is Damien Page, look enough of this small talk, I need to get my hands checked''. ''Very well, follow me'', Silstin says. He brings me into his office where he looks at my hands and says, ''Well, it seems as though you have fallen in one of our armies traps, for some reason Oakiu's army wants you, Damien''. What the hell is this guy talking about? I look Silstin in the eyes and say, ''So, for 3 days I have been walking around constantly without any security because some army wants me to be within their ranks''? ''precisely''. ''What do these encryptions mean?'' I say. Silstin replies, ''These markings indicate where you were at the time of the capturing, and at exactly what time the capture took place, they also remove any memory you have while the capturing took place''. Ok so basically I'm trapped here, great. ''When will the army start to look for me?'' I say. ''They don't need to'' Stilsin says with a sadistic tone of voice. At that moment flashes of colors surround me and somehow I get teleported to a dark room. Lights start to turn on one by one, and in a minute the whole room was visible. I'm inside of a chair, surrounded by unfamiliar faces, but one face stands out....OH NO, damn it, it's Hintasha. She's like the ugly duckling that fell off of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. She looks at me and says, ''Well...well...well, looks like Damien got himself into a little mess up huh? Telling a highly ranked army official that she is what? A dyke''? Oh man, I messed up badly here. I try to stand up but for some reason I am trapped onto this chair, it's like gravity is centered on my body. ''Don't try to get out of your seat Damien, we got a specialized gravity amplifier on your seat, and every time you try to get up, the heavier the gravity gets. Which basically means if you try to get out of your seat multiple times, you will get crushed''. What a way to pinpoint my demise. ''What do you want from me?'', I say. Hintasha responds, ''All we want from you Damien, is your expertise in marksmanship. We have been watching you, you see, constantly looking at your every move you made while in combat on Earth, and I must say I was enormously impressed. So we decided to pick you up and use you in our ranks as we rage war against our enemy, The Orgona Region''. If she says one more thing about war, I'm going to explode. ''So, you want me, to go inside your army, to fight your battles, while I am an earthling and I can fight my own battles back at home'', I say. ''Exactly, if you don't help us now, and if we lose this war, Earth will be destroyed by the Orgona Region. Is that what you want Damien? Do you want your own home planet to be destroyed and dismantled to it's very foundations by a 3 millennium ahead species?'' Hintasha says. Unable to talk, I just stay silent, I don't want to make this clown mad or else she might spray me with bullets. ''Alright then, you shall be suited up to go to war and trained in the virtual reality room, once your training is complete, you will be immediately teleported to the battle grounds. Is that understood?'', Hintasha says with authority. ''YES SIR'' I say with a sarcastic tone. Suddenly, 6 other men dressed in very advanced weaponry and armor rushes to me, lifts me up, and rushes me to a fitting room in this weird building. They strip me naked, and I say, ''I hope you guys are not gay, I don't need my body sexually abused''. They ignore me and dress me with extremely light clothes that are as hard as diamond when you hit them. The gun they give me is just incredible, I'm not sure what type of gun this is though. I ask ''What type of gun is this''? One of the men replies, ''This my friend, is a Particle Dismemberment Cannon, It is capable of tearing through any material on this planet, besides damaksus''. ''Why not damaksus?'' I say with a interested voice. ''Well, damaksus is not made by particles, but dark matter. Let me explain, when this planet was created, Oakiu was in the middle of all of the dark matter, and when particles and dark matter combined, it created a material that is impossible to make by hand. Therefore, the material was not made directly by particles, so it is able to deflect any particle beams. Also, because Oakiu was in the middle of all of this, we got the only damaksus on this planet, which is why the Orgona Region wants to take over Oakiu, to use this precious material for malicious purposes'', the man said. Fully dressed, the men ask me in unison, ''Are you ready to train''? I feel like I'm a war hero or something. ''Yes I am, let me teach you fools a thing or two about war'', I say. The men surround me, throw some sort of bomb on the floor that makes the weird colors again, and I end up in some sort of planetarium. The planetarium quickly changes into a technological masterpiece, and I see the room change from machinery with 1's and 0's floating around everywhere, to a purple desert type place with a purple sky. The men appear with me and say with unison, ''You are our platoon leader, this is your training to become not only fond of your weapon, but to sharpen your skills as a leader''. Who the hell do they think I am, Stonewall Jackson? Suddenly 20 holograms appear and I quickly shout, ''You three men, hide behind does sand dunes and make a quick turn in, fire your weapons in unison! You other 3 men, I want you to run backwards behind me and shoot rapidly at all of those holograms, I will go on top of that huge cactus type....thingy...and snipe them from up there''! The plan worked to perfection and not one causality happened, damn I'm good. The men throw the bomb again and the colors form around me and I say, ''This is the third time I have been surrounded by a cylinder rainbow, I'M NOT GAY''. I teleport back to that empty room with the table and Hintasha is waiting for me. ''Ahh Damien, you did remarkably well, so I will promote you to 1st platoon leader and you will go on a very important mission, if this mission succeeds, you can go home and the war will be over. Now, please teleport to the main room, and I will give you your briefing'', Hintasha says with enthusiasm. Oh great, another cylinder rainbow to invade my space. The men throw that teleportation bomb on the floor and I get transfered to the briefing room, where Hintasha is waiting with my platoon. ''Now Damien, listen closely, you and your platoon will be organizing a very important mission, this mission will determine the outcome of this war. Now, the plan is realitivly simple, all we want you to do is intelligently find a way to take out their antimatter power plant, now I know you don't know the properties of antimatter, so I will explain how you will destroy it. What you got to do is find a way for 2 of your men to deploy a containment capsule around the perimeter of the Antimatter power plant, then with your absolute aim, you will shoot through the tiny hole the capsule makes and there you go, their energy is destroyed along with their main buildings, and they will surrender. Any questions''? Hintasha says. ''What sort of defense will they have'''? I say while the rest of my platoon is staring with deep concentration. ''They will have many turrets, but because of your damaksus armor, you won't be affected'', Hintasha says. ''I say with excitement, I am ready to go!''. Me and my platoon gets dropped off on enemy soil, and already I am nervous. I look through my super vision scopes that the Oakiu army supplied and see an opening. ''Men! I want 5 of you to rush through that barricade up there, you see it? It is a hologram, after that, you will head north west and beat the living hell out of those unsuspecting fools'', I say with excitement. I watch and like a game of chess my plans worked to perfection. Me and the rest of my platoon rush in and destroy most of the opposition. ''Deploy Capsule!'' I say. The soldiers threw the capsules and I run on top of their barricade shoot through the little hole and BAM! The power plant explodes like a Coca-Cola bottle that has been shaken to much. Quickly I gather my men and teleport before the waves of the explosion caught us. Hintasha hugs me and says ''Thank you Damien! I knew you can do It!''. During the next few days, I just sat there, Wondering if I wanted to leave this planet and go back to my good ol' earth, but you know, maybe being away from that planet is good after all. -Angel Hernandez |
||
| © Copyright 2008 xTr3m3sT - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Angel, This is really fairly good. It's fun, and imaginative. I'd go through it, and perhaps clean up a little of the grammar. Such as: "Me and my platoon gets" Which should read "My platoon and I get". You know little things like that. Good show generally. Keep up the good work. Bobby |
||
|
xTr3m3sT Member
since 2008-03-03
Posts 415 |
Thank you very much Bobby. My next writing I will look for more mistakes, I didn't catch that one O_o |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
