»
Main Forums
»
Passions in Prose
»
The Journey of Jonas (an excerpt)
| Passions in Prose |
|
The Journey of Jonas (an excerpt) |
|
|
EagleScorpion Senior Member
since 2000-03-08
Posts 1644Here, Now, Forever 
|
hey guys. this is a little piece of something i've been working on. its taking me practically forever to finish, and i have neglected it for a while, but i wanted to know what you think. i feel like i can take it so many ways that i dont know where to begin.. but.. please read and enjoy if you will **************************************************** “Believe it Jonas,” said Rhys, “Everything you are about to see, I want you to believe, for it is all true.” Pictures flew by like cars on a street. Living portals, buzzing with life, continued to fly and morph about. From the valley cliff, Jonas relished this vantage point he had and marvelled at the flying pictures and portals that flew around. It was a tunnel of swirling color that seemed to go on endlessly. Beyond the floating screens was an expansive horizon that Jonas's mortal eyes have never seen the likes of before. It was then that Jonas realized that Fallon was sitting next to him. At this moment, she put her arm around him. She kissed him softly on the cheek, as a soft wind carressed them. “Beautiful, isn’t it?” said Rhys as his words echoed heavily, “We call this the Valley of Memory. Such a grand, exquisite place. I bet you are wondering what all of these flying televisions are for.” Rhys turned around and looked Jonas in the eyes, awaiting his answer. Everything was so bright and beautiful. Birds and other flying creatures flew by. The sky was seven different colors. Jonas looked at the floating television screens floating closest to him. They didn’t seem to be playing television programs, for sure. He saw his old friend Sayli in the picture,and it showed her by herself in her room, crying. “I....I.. dont... know.” stuttered Jonas. He saw another floating movie of his old pal Jim. It seemed as if this picture was a link to Earth, a view into the lives of his old friends who missed him. As Jonas looked into the screen at Jim, he observed Jim punching a locker in extreme anger and hurting his hand. “Do you believe in reincarnation, Jonas Walker?” “I.. I dont know what to believe anymore, I’m sorry.” Fallon took Jonas’s hand into hers. In her hand, Jonas felt a tiny glass ball that she placed into his hand. She then pulled his hand up in hers and kissed it, her sparkling blue eyes stared intensely into Jonas’s. Jonas looked back into Fallon's eyes while speaking to Rhys, "Is this my reincarnation?" Rhys did not answer. Jonas started to slowly examine each television screen in utter awe. The floating pictures moved into Jonas's view. They were aware of his attention and began to scroll by for him to observe. Jonas saw a funeral procession. “Dude...” Jonas said as he slowly obserbed each floating movie, “This is some sort of joke or bad dream or something.” “No, Jonas,” said Rhys, “You committed suicide. You no longer live on planet Earth anymore. What you are looking at is your own funeral, Jonas.” Jonas gripped the glass ball that Fallon gave him in his sweaty hand. He started to feel tears welling up in his eyes. He remembered now what he did, and it disturbed him. He blew his own brains out with a shotgun in front of the old shed by the abandoned house on Cedar Avenue. “But...why.. why am I still... in my body?” Jonas stammered, trying not to break down crying. “What is going to happen to me?” Jonas began to feel great anger and sadness at the same time. He was angry at himself. He was angry at these strange people who looked just like Jim and Sayli. He was starting to lose it. “Jonas, calm down, get a hold of youself,” said Rhys. “You wont have to be Jonas Walker for much longer. Just let us explain to you what we have to explain to you here...” Jonas couldn’t take it anymore and interrupted before Rhys could explain any further, “What do you mean I dont have to be Jonas Walker for much longer?!? What is that supposed to mean?!?" Jonas said, “I killed myself! Dont you see?” The sky turned from several different colors to blue, the color that Jonas was familiar with. The birds stopped singing. The floating pictures disappeared. Fallon took Rhys’s hand into hers and the two ethereal beings looked each other in the eyes solemnly as Jonas kept talking. “I dont know what this place is or what I’m doing here! I thought I was supposed to be dead!” He still gripped the glass marble that Fallon gave him in his hand, forgetting that he even had it. The three were silent now. Fallon and Rhys appeared to be saddened by Jonas’s outburst as they stood there on the edge of this grand valley of flying televisions. Suddenly, Fallon and Rhys began to quietly whisper some strange language that Jonas couldn’t make out. They then stood up and cornered him on the edge of that cliff. "Wha.. What are you guys doing?" Then, to Jonas’s great surprise, Fallon and Rhys began glowing. Brilliant light began to radiate from thier bodies, and some enchanting manner of music greeted Jonas's ears. This light and music made Jonas feel better. It was so beautiful. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever experienced. He didn’t feel sad and angry anymore. The light then died away again. Fallon’s head hung low. Tears were streaming down her face. The sky had transformed from blue into a pink, yellow, orange, and red miasma that dwarfed the most astounding sunset any mortal has even seen. “Okay... whatever you guys just did it just like, totally made me feel better about being here.. What the hell was that all about?” said Jonas, "I'm...I'm sorry guys," He began crying again, "Can you do that again or something?" “Jonas, dont worry about it, man,” said Rhys as he smiled and put his arm around Jonas. He whispered to Jonas, “We know you are confused. You have every right to be angry and sad. Your life that you were living was a very sad and lonely one. Jonas, we are here for you, man. The whole way.” Jonas’s lips trembled, "A..A..Angels curse?" He felt like he was going to cry again but then smiled as a tear escaped his eye. He began to come to terms with the hilarity of this situation. “What the hell is going on guys?” he joked as he hugged the two of them in a group hug. This was a very good moment for all three of them. Jonas began to feel an intense feeling of love inside of his chest that he never felt before, as well as an intense feeling that he had done this before, that he was here before. His knees then became weak as this feeling overpowered him, and he collapsed at the angels' feet. “Jonas,” Fallon said with a trembling voice, ”You know that little glowing ball that I gave you?” Jonas sniffled. He realized he was still gripping it tightly. It emmited a quiet, heavenly pitch of noise. “Yeah...?” “Do you want to know what it is?” [This message has been edited by LoveBug (02-07-2005 02:48 PM).] |
||
| © Copyright 2005 Joseph Alexander Knob - All Rights Reserved | |||
LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
Very vivid descriptions of a... different afterlife.  I especailly like where he sees how his suicide has affected his loved ones. I can't wait to read more!Oh, make me Thine forever |
||
|
miscellanea Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060OH |
I enjoyed reading this, too. You kind of left a cliff hanger at the end, didn't you? Looking forward to reading more. miscellanea |
||
|
EagleScorpion Senior Member
since 2000-03-08
Posts 1644Here, Now, Forever |
whoa... complete crap. |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
