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Is There Ever A Right Side of Wrong?
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Is There Ever A Right Side of Wrong? |
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Gemini Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203Wisconsin, USA |
I ask this question of myself over and over again. I wonder why my heart still aches for you whenever I repeat the words over to myself. What I told you that day... "That it is easier for me to admit I made a fool of myself than it is for me to admit I've fallen in love with you". So I replay over and over again, like something out of the script of "Groundhog Day". And you told me I never meant anything to you. And what did you do, did you ever do anything to encourage me to have these feelings for you? And I don't know what to say. So I think silently to myself, you never encouraged me to fall in love with you. It just happened. Maybe it happened because I felt lonely. Maybe it happened because when I was with you, the only thing you encouraged of me was to be myself. You had given me a confidence that I never felt before. Maybe when I was with you, I felt encouragement. You made me feel like I could fly. So I took chances. Chances that I would not have otherwise taken, down a path I should've never ventured. So I risked all one day. And you ask me, "What did I hope would've happened?" And I don't know what I hoped would've happened. Because nothing happened, maybe nothing could've. But its been 3 years since we exchanged these words. And I hear you are now divorced and I am still married. And it scares me to know what I know. What I wished would've happened. Didn't. When I left, you told me you never wanted to see me again. So I carry the loss of you and the ache of hurting the only someone who meant something to me. But have come to realize. That even though what I did was wrong And I did right by leaving. Was I wrong to tell you I loved you? When I did really love you? Sometimes the loss of losing you is still so profound. That if someone were to ask this of me... Do you still love him? I would have to respond with... Only Every day. [This message has been edited by Gemini (08-27-2002 12:30 AM).] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Sometimes the loss of losing you is still so profound. That if someone were to ask this of me... Do you still love him? I would have to respond with... Only Every day. ========================== I have learned along the way..(the hard way) that some people come into our lives and its their leaving that was the reason for us ever having them in the first place... Im not sure that will make sense to any one but me...but after reading this touching sincere write...me thinks you know what I am trying to say. Heartfelt write Gem...those last lines impact and intend hit the poetic mark. Some things never leave us ... some things never should. In the space between now and then |
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Gemini Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203Wisconsin, USA |
Thank you Janet, I sincerely know what you mean and I believe we have both shed tears for the same reasons. Thank you dear friend. |
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Wanda Member
since 2001-10-23
Posts 461 |
Gemini, Oh the regret of losing someone you deeply care about, moving on, realizing it is a mistake; and wishing for what might have been. This is well written, and filled with emotion. Wanda |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Gemini, deep and poignant write, particularly the last line which is a clincher! Kethry Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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