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CwboyAtHeart
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 541
Selah, WA, USA

0 posted 2001-05-12 01:07 AM

I write mainly simple rhyming poetry and songs...  This is my first time really trying prose, so let me know what you think.  Let me know how I could impove or change anything...

Dear Girl,
      I don't know who you may be.  I don't know where you might be.  All I know is that we are meant to be.  I know I'm not perfect, I have my flaws.  I am who I am, and that can't be helped, it won't change for anybody.  I know that you also have your flaws, for every person does.  I'm ready to get past that, though.  I'm watching for your heart.
      I know that you are out there somewhere.  I know I will someday find you and we will be in love forever.  You may be my best friend, my worst enemy, or I may have never met you before.  However, I know that I am meant for you, and you are meant for me.
      When we meet, we will know we're meant for eachother.  It may take minutes, it may take days, it may take weeks or months, but we will realize that we're made for eachother.  Every time I meet somebody, I wait for that special click.  Often, I think I've found it, but I can never be sure.  I take chances, trying to find you in different people.
      Where are you, and why haven't we found eachother yet?  Is it too soon?  I know I love you, and I know you love me, but we just don't know it yet.  Girl, I know you're there.  One day, I know that God will bring us together.
      It may happen any time, so I will keep my eyes open and watching for you.  In God's eyes, we're already together.  God knows that one day our hearts will become one.  I trust that he will show me the way to find you.
      Until we meet, or until we meet again, I will continue looking.  Maybe I'm looking too hard to find you, maybe I'm not looking hard enough.  I will find you, ad you will find me.

      Love,
      Cody

obscurity of cloud
Member

since 2001-05-11

Posts 294
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1 posted 2001-05-12 03:18 PM

Hi, this is not bad. I've read some of your poetry and i think this has your sense of poetic feel...maybe you could try reworking some of the phrases into a poem? Thanks for posting.

"so when at times the mob is swayed to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star" --Frost

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

2 posted 2001-05-12 05:38 PM

Well I certainly enjoyed the gist of this, so I think I'll get on my horse and find some of your other work...

a belated Welcome to Passions!

Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...
I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound.
KRJ

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