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(Abstract Verse) Mojo (From RedBook3)
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(Abstract Verse) Mojo (From RedBook3) |
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haze Senior Member
since 1999-11-03
Posts 528Bethlehem, PA USA 
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Mojo Amber she pours as moonstone gasoline into Tuesday tea Meteorite bubbles Jade pop-pop-pop more green eyes follow. **************************************** Follow this link for the discussed illustration http://memberpage.women.com/computers/hazeydaze/images/mojo.gif < !signature--> "I shall leave nothing before matchsticks." [This message has been edited by haze (edited 01-17-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Haze McElhenny - All Rights Reserved | |||
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jbouder Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash |
How does one critique abstract verse? I loved the visual accompaniment (oddly enough, it helped me make sense, albeit abstractly, of the verse). Enjoyed this much, lady. Jim "If I rest, I rust." - Martin Luther |
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haze Senior Member
since 1999-11-03
Posts 528Bethlehem, PA USA |
JB... If it is esoteric enough to be universal (enough) that you found an image inside of your self-appointed left-brain philosophies...I guess I did good. This is just a piece of Digital Dallying by moi. Maybe I should have saved it til after the readings... maybe it gives too much away... In short-I would suggest that even in the abstract, if it invokes an image or emotion, than the abstract was effective... Thank you much for the read my friend Til Again ~haze |
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karneliann Junior Member
since 1999-10-28
Posts 44Baltimore, MD, USA |
pardon the cliche, but this poem is like a jewel. perhaps it has something to do with the mention of several jewels in the poem itself, or the jewel-like colors in your visual art. in any case, both are utterly amazing, and i heap on you the highest of my praises, for what they're worth. i absolutely adore this! "My empire is of the imagination." -- She |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
I think it is... Mojo and so is the graphic...lovely! |
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haze Senior Member
since 1999-11-03
Posts 528Bethlehem, PA USA |
Karneliann...Thank you. I value your praise, treasure it. As I said before, I will gladly give it to you straight as that is what I would like in return. So I will take this straight and thank you again. TA...~haze ******************************************** LR...Crimson Thank yous...Til Again...~haze |
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jbouder Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash |
Haze: Don't let this get out too much, but I am left-brained by discipline. I DO have a right brain (I just keep it on a leash).  It didn't give too much away. Just helped a visual thinker visualize. Made the experience quite a positive one. Thanks.Jim |
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Not A Poet Member Elite
since 1999-11-03
Posts 3885Oklahoma, USA |
Haze, I loved the graphic but I must admit the words just went right over my head this time. I mean, they were pretty enough words, except for gasoline maybe, but I just couldn't put them together. I'll keep trying though. And thanks for your help. Pete |
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haze Senior Member
since 1999-11-03
Posts 528Bethlehem, PA USA |
Jim, my friend... We all know you are the proud possessor of an ambidextrous brain, who did you think you were fooling? (Not I said the cat)  ) Thank you...******************************************** Pete, (May I call you Pete?) The mojo in this case (the source of magic) is fixed in the property of gemstones...what she is doing is pouring the magic into a dull gray day (a non-day like Tuesday, just my particular choice.) I used the "more green eyes follow" to try to illuminate the day as seen through the magic & mystery held in green eyes. I don't do much with abstract, its a new venue...I'm trying it on. I don't know that I'm crazy about it...I'm just trying it on. Add that to the fact that I have picked an esoteric topic and *bing* Do you feel like your looking at a Picasso through a Dali-Scope? (if you do, does it make you want to go further? does it stop you?) Thank you both my friends... Til Again, ~haze |
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Trevor Senior Member
since 1999-08-12
Posts 700Canada |
Haze, I'm not much for abstract, though I do believe it definetly has a place in all art...and life for that matter, so to be blunt about the poem....I just didn't dig it, nothing personal, I thought you did the form justice, just I isn't-ain't and probably will never be all too crazy for the style(though I often think I'd like to try it sometime instead of looking from the outside...perhaps then my fondness for this style would grow), but what I did want to comment about was how the picture inspired your words and how your words could inspire a completely different picture which in turn could then inspire completely different words...and so on and so forth, the creative process may actually be an infinite...anyways just a little thought that perhaps seemed interesting enough at it's time of conception but will probably read more dull through retrospect. Thanks for the read, take care, Trevor |
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roxane Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 505us |
haze- i read this aloud three times to make sure that i was getting from it what i was supposed to be getting. i think it's a great descriptive piece, but also, it has a sort of rhythm to it that makes it most appealing. i don't know why. i can't really describe it, but it's great. |
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Not A Poet Member Elite
since 1999-11-03
Posts 3885Oklahoma, USA |
Haze, Thanks for the personal explanation. That helps a little but I guess I'm just a little too dense (or maybe old fashioned (or maybe just old) to really understand. But you do have a way with words. And please call me Pete, if you are so inclined. Pete |
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haze Senior Member
since 1999-11-03
Posts 528Bethlehem, PA USA |
Trevor... Thank you for your honest views (it is always what I want & need) On the creative proccess: Yes, I do know where you are going, it works alot with me that way. Poems inspire pictures, inspire poems, and yet more pictures. The cycle feeds itself if I allow it. The only problem (for me) with that is I then get stuck on a train and can't find the pull chord to stop the patterns. I like fresh images so I try not to use & reuse (to often) although Corso did it to mark his works, it can sometimes be a trap... Well enough of that...Thank you again Trevor... Til Again ~haze ****************************************** Oh roxanne... I personally have been working around this one, not sure to keep it or let it go...I have taken to reading it aloud, letting it expand on the breath, so on. I thank you...that another feels the flows and bubbles; Well...between you and karneliann, its life is saved. I am going to work it into a performance piece in my audio files. I have an ezine editor that likes my voice renditions (ugh) so this will be the true telling...*S* I thank you twice...TA...~haze ******************************************** Pete, thank you gain for the re-read and your honest feelings. Also, thank you for the broad compliment...its warming to read comments like that. I thank you twice. On Abstract Experssion: I don't think its age or density deciding... i have looked at many "Great" works of abstract (poetry & paint) Sometimes I wonder *g* "why this one?" when the other goes so through me? Abstract lends itself, I think, to personal preference. Is it good, bad, or indifferent...who knows. I think abstract is like Ginger, you love it or hate it...nothing less¬hing more... TilAgain, ~haze X-My Heart...one day I will learn to type... [This message has been edited by haze (edited 01-18-2000).] |
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Kevin Taylor Member
since 1999-12-23
Posts 185near Vancouver, BC, Canada |
I, on the other hand, would have traded the clinker I call my soul to have written it. That and maybe a few other things. Well... there's a box of unused lines, and um... I have several rhymes that have NEVER been used. Mint... well almost... I only had them in my mouth a half dozen times. Tops. Kevin "Poetry is, at once, what you get... and how you got there." |
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haze Senior Member
since 1999-11-03
Posts 528Bethlehem, PA USA |
thank you kevin taylor... there are days when I would take you up on that offer (even for the ABC ones) *L* Thank you again ~haze BTW-GREAT website you have there...really GREAT-Strong Kudos! |
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