Dear Jane (with a Lawyer's Twist -- Just for Fun)

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jbouder
Member Elite

since 1999-09-18

Posts 2534
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash

0 posted 1999-12-29 08:30 AM

Alienation of Affections,
The sweetest of the court's confections,
Go ahead and pack your backs 'cause hubby's gonna sue!

His house and cars are mine, my dear,
As are his yacht and pier.
I'm sure I'll be quite happy, love, 'cause hubby's gonna sue!

I hope your life'll be  complete
With your new love living on the street,
With paper bags on his perfect feet, 'cause hubby's gonna sue!

My lawyers will have dealt their strife
While, with his cash, I'll rebuild MY life,
With Heidi Klum as my new wife, 'cause hubby's gonna sue!

'Cause hubby's gonna sue!

***

Inspired in part by Balladeer's & Toerag's antics in OP.

Just a side note:

Alienation of affections is a legal remedy whereby an estranged spouse can sue a cheating spouse's new love interest for damages if it can be demonstrated that the love interest lured the cheating spouse away with money, gifts, etc. (these were some of the elements in NC, at any rate).  It is an old law but it still comes up from time to time.

< !signature-->

Jim

"If I rest, I rust."  - Martin Luther

[This message has been edited by jbouder (edited 12-29-1999).]

dispatch debbie
Junior Member

since 1999-12-29

Posts 16
Michigan

1 posted 1999-12-29 12:39 PM

Felt a hange of person in middle of poem, unclear who's perpective I'm receiving. In either case, lighthearted enough but not my cup of tea.

Treat others the way you wish to be treated.

haze
Senior Member

since 1999-11-03

Posts 528
Bethlehem, PA USA

2 posted 1999-12-29 12:51 PM

ROFLMAO...Jim I had much fun with this...Thanks

warmhrt
Senior Member

since 1999-12-18

Posts 1563

3 posted 1999-12-30 01:38 AM

Witty, Jim...sounds like one of those songs they play on morning shows on the radio, with the guys in the foreground talking about certain people in certain situations relating to the content of the song.

warmhrt

roxane
Senior Member

since 1999-09-02

Posts 505
us

4 posted 1999-12-31 12:19 PM

lol, i think it's funny, but your narrator is an absolute ass! how could anyone be so jolly about suing their wife and lover. i understand the spite, but i mean, how could anyone be so damn happy about it. still, it's quite funny

Trevor
Senior Member

since 1999-08-12

Posts 700
Canada

5 posted 1999-12-31 12:51 PM

Oh Jimmy Boy....you yanks and your confusing laws....we don't have any here except that littering is punishable by having a foot and two fingers chopped off.

Pretty funny stuff....though I didn't fully get the jist of it until I read the little explaination....just thought it was a reversal of roles...rich wife gives alimony to husband typastuffa.

ANyways Jimbolia, hope ya have a good New Year,
Take care

Hawk183
Member

since 1999-12-24

Posts 130

6 posted 1999-12-31 01:29 PM

I would have to say that this poem was very clever....I to had to read it again to get the perspective straight...but hell..that just makes it more fun. NIce twist.

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