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DramaMama
Junior Member

since 1999-10-28

Posts 47
Louisiana

0 posted 1999-11-20 09:47 PM

Miasma

found a word
and put it into my pocket
to save for later

maybe I can use it
when pungent fumes
of anger assail me

perhaps pull it out
when gripping disgust
makes me gag

examine it
while I’m swamp-walking
in sucking mire

or toss it
into my box of lexicon,
to admire
to polish
to ponder in my hand
waiting for the opportunity
to fit it,
like the last piece of a puzzle,
into verse

Poertree
Senior Member

since 1999-11-05

Posts 1359
UK

1 posted 1999-11-21 03:38 PM

Pat, because this is a short piece my fixation with trying to understand what is going on in a poem was even more focussed, and of course the title of the poem grabs the attention.

"Miasma"

1 : a vaporous exhalation formerly believed to cause disease; also : a heavy vaporous emanation or atmosphere
2 : an influence or atmosphere that tends to deplete or corrupt ; also : an atmosphere that obscures

The first thought I had is that the "word" put in the pocket is indeed Miasma and the remainder of the poem clever references to the meanings of that word. On balance I decided that was what you were doing or is there more to it than that?

Philip

DramaMama
Junior Member

since 1999-10-28

Posts 47
Louisiana

2 posted 1999-11-21 05:27 PM

Philip,

You nailed it.

Found the word when I was looking for a spelling and bam, the poem hit me.

Pat

roxane
Senior Member

since 1999-09-02

Posts 505
us

3 posted 1999-11-21 06:07 PM

i liked this one, although i would have no idea what miasma meant if it wasn't for poetree's definition of it. it was good.

Brad
Member Ascendant

since 1999-08-20

Posts 5705
Jejudo, South Korea

4 posted 1999-11-22 04:13 AM

Agree. Think this is a very strong poem. Reminds me of Merwin and his 'awe' poems as someone called them. Strong yet casual style (I think it's hard to do both). The mood of the piece is very clear and powerful (am I being redundant?)

This one sings.

Still just an opinion,

Brad

DramaMama
Junior Member

since 1999-10-28

Posts 47
Louisiana

5 posted 1999-11-22 09:19 AM

Thanks, Roxanne and Philip. Appreciate your comments.

And many thanks, Brad, for your thoughts, which are always insightful and carefully chosen.

Pat

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