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Please.....
| Critical Analysis #1 |
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Please..... |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563
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Please...take this from me she pleads she begs down on her knees though no one hears her nor offers alternatives Why me she wails she sobs into robes soaked with cries past though no one answers not a whisper she decides what society tells her must be the truth Please...take this from me her mother pleads and begs down on her knees grief holding her to the floor beneath undeserved guilt and sorrow Why her mother cries and sobs into the note she'd left behind society does not answer for it knows not of it's guilt Kris There are no precedents: You are the first You that ever was. ~ Christopher Morley |
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Flower Power Junior Member
since 2000-07-26
Posts 29Ottawa, Ontario, Canada |
Kris, A very touching poem. I'm just not sure I like the references to society. Society -- the word....it's supposed to explain everything, but what does it mean exactly. More importantly, what do YOU mean by society? These days, we can hardly write words like "love" and "soul" in our poetry because they've been overused and are very vague. "Society" does the same thing for me. I suppose that's all I really have to say. But it's a wonderful poem otherwise. "Can anything be sadder than work unfinished? Yes: work never begun." ~Christina Rossetti |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
Society, in this poem, as in usual context, is the world in which we live....the people, the media, the systems of justice, healthcare, politics, etc. One could possibly say it is the "atmosphere" in which we live. That is how I meant "society" to be percieved here. Thanks for reading, and for your comments, Kris I am not a visionary ~ I am a practical idealist. ~ Gandhi |
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Not A Poet Member Elite
since 1999-11-03
Posts 3885Oklahoma, USA |
Kris, I'm a little puzzled here. As usual, I like the way you have put this together but it doesn't present anything I can personally get into, so to speak. It leaves a sad impression, perhaps of oppression or something along those lines (I'm sure that was your intent and you succeeded) but there isn't enough enlightenment for dense old me. Pete |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
Pete, dear sweet Pete, You are not dense, in the least,  and no one with your wit and charm could ever be called old!It could be perceived as any type of oppression...but, specifically, I'm referring to what is termed "mental illness", where that oppression may be a factor in one's decision not to go on. I'm afraid it is probably, once again, my tendency to be a bit too obscure. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment, Kris < !signature--> I am not a visionary ~ I am a practical idealist. ~ Gandhi [This message has been edited by warmhrt (edited 11-28-2000).] |
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Not A Poet Member Elite
since 1999-11-03
Posts 3885Oklahoma, USA |
(Smacks the butt of his palm in an upward glancing blow to his forehead) Geez, I should know when you write that way it deals with mental illness. See, I already admitted that I am a little dense. As far as old, my little sister gave me a baseball cap the other day, it reads "OLD FART"  Pete |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
hi warmhrt, i will just express my thoughts since i am no expert at poetry....  i liked this poem and i liked the way you tied society with her demise?suicide? but somehow i like this poem to be further tightened....i mean she pleads she begs she wails she sobs is kind of repetition and sounds almost "whiny"--i feel some readers may not give the poem the attention it deserves.... its probably just me though...sometimes you venture out into CA and you wonder whether the "flaws" you find are a subconscious tendency of you being overly fussy...HA! thanx for the read [This message has been edited by kaile (edited 12-01-2000).] |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
kaile, Thanks for reading, and I agree, it may sound "whiny", but I think that is how someone in this state would sound. I'm glad you brought up society's part in this...though they are not directly responsible (the illness is), the pressure, the stress, and the attitudes cause stress which can bring about the symptoms. If society were more accepting and understanding, there would be less of this. Thanks for your comments, Kris All good poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings...~William Wordsworth |
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