Critical Analysis #1 |
Gone |
warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
who are you? I no longer know you. perhaps I never did, was mistaken in my judgement, in giving you my trust. when the real work of friendship began, you were suddenly gone, before I could say your name, or turn my head to see you leaving. for a time, I could feel you, along with my pain, though the wishings have faded, the anger needed no longer as veils for the sadness. you were the one who failed, you did not see past the mask. now when I hear your name, I do not envision you, your image haunts me no more. you didn't have the makings of a true, loyal friend, how could you see deep inside me when you knew not who you were? All that you've left behind now is a closed and locked door Kristine Karinen "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." ~ Albert Einstein |
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Poertree Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359UK |
kristine, as a poem i can't say i like this much, mainly because it has too much the feel of a personal message or letter, and this seems to have got (gotten) in the way of the construction of an interesting piece. It's very sad though - sounds like a relationship that was maybe full of overcomplications and misunderstandings. philip |
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hawkat New Member
since 2000-09-09
Posts 7 |
I like this very much as I can relate to it,but i think it could benefit with some verse breaks rather than being one long stanza.Vividly and poignantly depicts a failure of understanding in a relationship. |
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Brad Member Ascendant
since 1999-08-20
Posts 5705Jejudo, South Korea |
Kris, Why is it I think you know what I'm going to say about this? C'mon, I know you can do better. Just an opinion, Brad |
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