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Critical Analysis #1
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Inner Self
| Critical Analysis #1 |
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Inner Self |
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eldridgejackson Member
since 2000-04-30
Posts 91 |
Inner Self Barren except for a flower or two All paths leading away from the present Unsure of direction up/down in/out no matter All I hold true is false all logic now absent The feeling of loss I hold with fear and confusion Yet released it offers great understanding and gain I grasp for the old me as it dissolves into memory Reflection of me why do you expose this pain? Searching for answers I hear nothing familiar Only the scars speak and they lie without regard It’s strange how clear everything looks without bias My old preconceived ideas are easy to discard I hear lies with change in tone and masked pretense Like a bullhorn telegraphing its intent to deceive Honesty and truth now warms the cold battlefield Light shines within eyes of faces I easily perceive A guide speaks then disappears into the next thought Familiar streets curve and run into the vast wall I see an old man fret about death and immortality My tears cleanse as I leap into self’s ocean squall James Cain 2000 |
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| © Copyright 2000 eldridgejackson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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mysticharm Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 189Canada |
Hi James this is an intense poem that asks a lot of questions and not a whole lot of answers, what do I believe? what is false? who am I? of course if all logic fails there always star trek and spock LOL It's a good poem James, it does make a person think.  debbie debbie Think of saying "I Love You" as always being overdue. Love is a gift, not an obligation. unknown |
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eldridgejackson Member
since 2000-04-30
Posts 91 |
Thanks for the comment. What if reality as we percieve it was gone. What if we were to look at pure truth and reality as is. Would we recognize it? I like Star Trek and Matrix. |
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Forrest Cain Member
since 2000-04-21
Posts 306Chas.,W.V. USA |
I used to think loosing my vision would be the worst thing that could happen to me. But I think loosing touch with reality or encountering unknown realms would be much worse. Having inside information obviously I know where your coming from and where your going. The last two verses I really thought well done. Good post. |
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eldridgejackson Member
since 2000-04-30
Posts 91 |
Thanks Forrest I remember the first eyes that had light in them. Do you? You lose but you remain intact I think. Thanks for the comments James |
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Lighthousebob Member Elite
since 2000-06-14
Posts 4725California |
 Nice Content... Reminds me of some of the insulin reactions that I have had in the past. Unfortunately, some people don't come out of them alive... The imagination can seem so real as driving down the highway at 80 MPH and not knowing whre you are in reality. Thank God for Angels...Technically, maybe you can even out the syllables per line since you are rhyming. I think this might help with the flow of your poem. Just an opinion, Bob <>< |
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eldridgejackson Member
since 2000-04-30
Posts 91 |
Gee Bob you should have read it before I got rid of 50% of the extra words. Lol I will keep working on it. Unless it stresses me out to the point of a Schizoprenic break then I will take a break. James |
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