Critical Analysis #1 |
interior decorating |
jenni Member
since 1999-09-11
Posts 478Washington D.C. |
middle-class feng shui poets paper with cool irony and sage cynicism the walls of safe suburban hilltop houses that have no mirrors (but plenty of windows); how clever, how chic, how post-naive, everything arranged just so; the hoi polloi invited to gape, in awe, on a dinner party of one. |
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Elyse Member
since 2000-04-16
Posts 414Apex (think raleigh) NC |
i thought this worked really well. nice and tight, interesting concept. i really like the rhythm (im sure there's a meterical term i could use that i cant think of) and alliteration of "safe suburban hilltop houses. although, i might put a comma betweeen "middle class" and "feng shui" for clarity's sake. (does feng shui need caps?) oh, and what does hoi polloi mean? luv Elyse<----does not speak hawaiian Do I contradict myself? Very well then . . . . I contradict myself; I am large . . . . I contain multitudes. -Papa Walt |
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Poertree Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359UK |
jenni think i'll just have a think about this ..lol ..that's code for i'll let Brad and Jim explain it to me ..btw (back later on it though).... meanwhile... elyse hoi polloi comes from the Greek for "the many" (i know that coz Webster's told me!)it means, according to Webster, "the general populace, the masses". The "real edge" to the phrase doesnt really come through from that though. In the UK at least it means "the unwashed masses" ie a slightly derogatory tone .. generally used by those who feel themselves superior to the remainder of humanity usually by reason of birth, but also, say, education, wealth, or maybe a fancied ability to write "clever" poetry ...heh heh .....the word plebeian also springs to mind ..... now you can return the favour please elyse (heh heh get that "please elyse"!!..lol)by explaining "feng shui" to me ...lol later Philip<----does not speak japanese |
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Gonzalo Junior Member
since 2000-04-08
Posts 44MI |
Loved this! Reminds me of the great line in "The Fight Club" - Jack trying to decide "...which coffee table defines me as a person...." (or something close to that) The loneliness, desperation and futility are palpable. |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
hi jenni, What I get from this is a feeling of disdain ... both for those who write poetry only for others (somewhat commercially), and for the masses who "feast upon" a poem that "is" the poet. "that have no mirrors (but plenty of windows);" I liked the above lines, indicating the fact that they cannot see themselves, but thrive on allowing themselves to be seen, and peering into the lives of others. I may be totally off from your intended message, but I have a feeling this is going to be one of those poems that everyone is going to interpret differently. Interesting read, jenni, Kris I have no idea what "feng shui" is either, and would like to know... the poet's pen...gives to airy nothing A local habitation and a name ~ Shakespeare |
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Gonzalo Junior Member
since 2000-04-08
Posts 44MI |
Isn't feng shui the Japanese(?) practice of arranging interior furnishings to mimic the 'flow' of nature? Has spiritual implications, also. Hope someone else can further elaborate and/or correct. |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
Jenni, first off I love the cynicalist sneer to this poem...you seem to be saying "You who think so much, and live in glass houses...step up and be counted!" This is along the lines of those rebel poets of the coffee bar era years ago..I liked this muchly. As far as a critique, hmmm..... middle-class feng shui poets (LOL cute..self appreciative term here I think!) paper with cool irony and sage cynicism the walls of (this line was awkward for me to read....was it meant that way? It halted me where I wanted to *flow*) safe suburban hilltop houses that have no mirrors (to see their faults) (but plenty of windows); (hehe to show off their wonderfulness!) how clever, how chic, how post-naive, everything arranged just so; (again a SHOW) the hoi polloi invited to gape, in awe, (of course the masses...awed by the persons self appreciation! (I REALLY liked the term hoi polloi! Very Watership Down-esque...wonderful choice..)) on a dinner party of one. ! (the the dinner party of one... drove the point home nicely) Feng Shui....well lemme say...its a chinese belief of where the energy flows through your home, determines how your life will end up. Such as if your master bedroom is in a certain place, you will be rich, or where a large piece of furniture blocks the feng shui could mean discord in a home. All in all it is fascinating, and a friend offered to use feng shui to help me rearrange my home, but I sorta declined But I say wonderful poem, with a power-punch. ~Heather [This message has been edited by X Angel (edited 06-05-2000).] |
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peppermint35 Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1106Texas, USA |
I like it...I like it.....good and sarky. Peppermint Life is a Wheel |
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Elyse Member
since 2000-04-16
Posts 414Apex (think raleigh) NC |
hey! i thought i was gonna get to tell philllllip about feng shui! curses! im off to pout now. luv Elyse |
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Poertree Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359UK |
too slllllllllllow on the feng shui thingy ellllllllyse grrrrrr you only get away with it once btw ..lolllllllllllll |
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Poertree Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359UK |
jenni i was going to come back on this and let you know my interpretation except that between them i think heather and kris have done a pretty good job. Heather especially picked up something i hadn't noticed before which was the idea of the "windows" which oh so ostentatiously show off the "creativity" also becoming the Achilles heel of such people .. ie the more showy they are the more vulnerable they make themselves even though they may not be able to see it. "People in glass houses ......" summed it up well .....but of course that's what you had in mind...no? ~smile~ think the parentheses make it better as well.... See ya ! P |
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