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Critical Analysis #1
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A Portrait of Death (Revision)
| Critical Analysis #1 |
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A Portrait of Death (Revision) |
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Wordshaman Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 110Illinois, USA |
Gregory Corso once said, "Death weeps because Death is human, Spending all day in a movie when a child dies." Death, wrapped in her solemn shroud with her Sickle and hourglass in hand, Sits silently across the room Waiting to walk our sallow streets To put her emaciated hand on passersby To bring them upon their time. On the table lies her lengthy list, and Death sighs. She loves life as much as the next, But when it's time, it's time. She is a servant of God. Looking out her black window set in blackened stone, Death wrings her hands And wishes she could know love. Death knows very few admirers Who would not feel cheated If she touched them tonight. Death has held regretful souls Strangulating on self-inflicted rope, Her cool embrace a limp release from the choking. Death spends the day in parks Watching children play, Only to end up thinking she will kill these children, Some sooner than later, Someday. Death regrets her very existence. |
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| © Copyright 2000 Greg Butler - All Rights Reserved | |||
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bboog Member
since 2000-02-29
Posts 303Valencia, California |
Word~ I wonder if you could say this another way but with a little touch of humor and a bit more subtle. Since death is often portrayed as a shadow, perhaps she simply makes wall shadows. Death, wrapped in her solemn shroud with her Sickle and hourglass in hand, Sits silently across the room Moves her fingers to make a police dog an animal wall shadow to bring a lawyer down before his time Perhaps she makes a bunny rabbit for children or something? Anyway, just a suggestion. Good luck with your writing. best regards, bboog |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
Looks to me like someone is reaching a time in his life when he's facing his mortality...sorry, I said I wouldn't do that anymore. The poem is well-written...good word choices, imagery etc., but I'm curious as to why death was depicted as a female instead of the usual male metaphor. Perhaps because women are more compassionate in your eyes, or that a woman in your past was almost the "death of you"? Interesting...I'd really like to know...that is if you do know the conscious reasoning behind this. Kris the poet's pen...gives to airy nothing A local habitation and a name ~ Shakespeare |
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Wordshaman Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 110Illinois, USA |
Kris, The idea behind Death being a woman is to show a certain fragility that we never see in death. No woman in my past who was the death of me, no looking at my mortality. Women are great, by the way. A lot more compassionate than the majority of the men I know, for sure. So no pox on the women of the world that they should be women. I like to think of a female face being the last I see on my way out, too, so....much respect to the women of the world, despite the way I've come across in recent times. Wordshaman There is no Devil. Just God when He drinks. --Tom Waits |
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Darin Junior Member
since 2000-04-02
Posts 17 |
I like the way you explained death. I haven't ever looked at it this way before.  |
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tom Member
since 2000-01-26
Posts 90s/w penna u.s.a. |
Wordshaman Death,like everything else is personal. The fact your death takes on a female personality softens the impact of the poem just enough to let the reader get thru it. I liked the poem with the exception of the last line,without death there is no life.I think it should read death accepts or comes to terms with her very existence.My opinion. tom |
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Wordshaman Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 110Illinois, USA |
Tom--yes, I see where you're coming from, but my portrait of death paints a death who doesn't want to do what she does. She may not LIKE it, but she is forced to do her job. As you very correctly said, there is no life without death. Wordshaman There is no Devil. Just God when He drinks. --Tom Waits |
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