Critical Analysis #1 |
A sampling of my thoughts |
Missed_fantasy Junior Member
since 1999-08-16
Posts 16Mankato, MN, USA |
Wednesday Do you hear what I mean I speak through my actions What is life? What is love? When will my turn come? I'm floating in a limbo Surcease a dream won't grasp Can't write fast enough Can't think hard enough Head hurts, hate the music Sun is too bright outside too dull inside Where should I belong? What can I do with myself? Why do I want to cry? Why do I stop the tears? Why can't I stay interested in life, in love, in work I push away my loved ones To regret our parting Get mad so fast, can't help it I sit here on a Wednesday Not so different from all other days I've lived We name them to tell them apart from the other identical days. ------------------ Love always and blessed be my children |
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© Copyright 1999 Missed_fantasy - All Rights Reserved | |||
mister61 Junior Member
since 1999-08-12
Posts 41bergen county, nj |
Very expressive; you described powerful feelings maybe a little too clearly for comfort, actually. One small critique: the pace seems a bit rushed. Then again, that might be intentional. I like this very much, overal. |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap |
This piece stays very true to its title ... it does capture a sampling of thoughts ... I loved the line "we name them to tell them apart" ... how true ... well written. ------------------ "Nunc lento sonitu dicunt, morierus" (When I hear the bell tolling softly for another, it says to me, "Thou must die.") |
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