Wish I Could ( Ron and Magic Lost )

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Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

0 posted 2021-08-12 09:18 AM

This is the best I can do right now with the sadness. Ron. Someone I've never met, but because of this place he created, I feel like I did meet him. Because of his words, his very wise and mostly gentle way of putting people in their place when they were being ridiculous, (yes. I experienced this personally and appreciated it.), his supportive nature, his patience, his voice of reason, and so much more. I wish I could say it all here. I wish I could say something more beautiful or express something other than the anger that I feel right now. Maybe I'll be ready at another time. For now, this.

Death has stormed the halls!
It is not silent.
It is loud
Bold
and entitled!
Quakes the heart
with every booming step
and breaks the battle weary
with a sweep of hand
across this life littered board.
How can we fight against a thing
that mocks your prayers
severs faith,
laughs at your tears,
uses your anger against you,
and leaves the living
to sift
through memories?
This power is not one
who appreciates the moments
when your knees are brought to ground
and will is sucked out
then scattered
on raw choking breaths
exhaled
seemingly from your soul!
Merciful is not it's nature.
There is no compassion in those eyes
Just the cold finality
and collection of those you love,
those you admire,
those you're fond of
and those whose breath
made this world bearable.
They say you have to keep living
as the aftermath
the extinguished dreams
the blotted out future
swirl and entangle you
in a state of questioning.
Why?
For those going
marked viciously by sickness
we beg for more time
while this beast
this unconquerable thing
sets its feet on the ground
with a taunting thump each time,
warning us
promising us!
For those claimed
we attempt solace
however we can
but I...
I stand here now
in the futility of anger
teeth grinding against what is
wet with tears for everyone
ever lost,
pounding mangled fists
against walls to the other side
while death laughs at my demands!
Give
Them
Back!
I wish I could
be hopeful!
I wish I could
make grief a prettier thing!
I wish I could have more hope against
tides of loss to come!
but I simply can't!
I can only swallow
then
push my feet and will to go.

"I know this love will tear me to pieces
I know his hands will dig up my secrets"

Meg Myers

Kit McCallum

Administrator

Member Laureate

since 2000-04-30

Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada

1 posted 2021-08-12 10:21 AM

I felt these words Jenn … the anger, the frustration and the depth of the sadness. He was a wonderful man and he is gone too soon. My tears flowed through your words. Thank you for putting your beautiful voice to that pain.

Best wishes and hugs,
/Kit

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

2 posted 2021-08-12 03:33 PM

Thank you, dear. Love you for sharing the collective pain.

"The business of the poet...is to show the sorriness underlying the grandest things and the grandeur underlying the sorriest things." Thomas Hardy

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