»
Main Forums
»
Open Poetry #50
»
Cancer Of The Lung 003 (The Why Me Phase)
| Open Poetry #50 |
|
Cancer Of The Lung 003 (The Why Me Phase) |
|
|
jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas 
|
Cancer Of The Lung 003 (The Why Me Phase) There was this beautiful babe, I loved her to death - she was four, I was five and we'd spend a lot our time beneath the ligustrum that lined the side of the house, smooching and hugging, enjoying each other to the fullest. Then we moved away, sudden like, so fast I never knew we were leaving until I was piled into the car and driven off. So fast, I never got to tell Lowella . . . Goodbye. I've lived with that for over 70 years. I think maybe that contributes to The Why Me? The 'bad things' I've done from then, and on into my future, all of which I'm sure add to The Why Me? I'm guilty of number of things, the worst of which I'll not share - I will with things like when I was deeply in love again - my girlfriend lived several miles away. When I could afford it, I'd take the bus, often I'd have to walk, sometimes I'd walk willingly because I wanted to get flowers for her, and sometimes, for her mom. You see there was a cemetery close to her house that provided a small shortcut, and, naturally, the prettiest flowers you ever saw. I would speak to the grave-sites' resident, explaining that they'd had the pleasure of the flowers for several days now, and before their beauty faded, I could make sure they were oohed and ahhed over one more time. Never were my words negatively received! And the oohing and ahhing at her house were sounds to behold. Of course there was a really 'negative side' to the giving of the roses, that I feel probably added mightily to my 'why me' phase: I'd stay at my girl's house until 1 a.m. or so, eleven p.m. if I still wanted to catch the last bus, but you see, there were so-o many bicycles between her house and mine, and it was so-o natural to ride one home and dump it (forever lost) into the canal several blocks from home. Probably not the best of decisions, especially when looking at it from sixty-plus years later, when questioning - why me? Now I've gone and made myself feel bad, for some of the things I've done, so I'm going to take a nap probably plagued by dreams of all the kids I stole from, the residents of the cemetery who couldn't fight back (thank God!), but I promise you, there's more to come, confessional isn't done, or maybe, just maybe, it is, and the price I've paid, is Cancer Of The Lung. ~~~ © wesley james beard, jr. june 21, 2020 |
||
| © Copyright 2020 Wesley James Beard, Jr. - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Lori Grosser Rhoden Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202Fair to middlin' of nowhere |
Jimmy, Bless your heart! I am so grateful to you for sharing this journey with us. I hope you are writing for completely selfish purposes along the way. ~L |
||
|
Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
We are all on this journey together to learn from each other. Thank you for sharing. |
||
|
Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
Thank you for the look in. I can't imagine such a large price for small things, and I'm sure the graveyard residents didn't mind the flowers going to someone who could smile at them.
|
||
|
Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
I think we all are probably harder judges of self than the world as a whole would be. I agree with Jenn, and probably the whole consensus, though, nothing you could have done in life merits the reward or penalty you see this as. Michael |
||
|
augustsky Senior Member Posts 828 midwest US |
(((You)))..Dear Poet are 1 in a million, I embrace your courage. Sky~ |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
