Now listen guys and listen well
For I have a tragic tale to tell
Our manly ways are in decline
Because we are forced to sit and dine
On packets which our wives unwrap
Tasteless junk and pre-cooked crap
~
I ask you, does your woman cook?
Or more concerned with how she looks
And how much precious time it saves
By bunging it in the microwave
and sets before you her creation
A quivering plate of radiation
~
She’ll moan that when she is feeling fruity
You can’t do your nightly duty
Or your pathetic performance is so poor
That you don’t love her anymore
But isn’t it any wonder that
when your libido’s less than a crippled gnat
~
Oh bring back those heady days of yore
When all our womenfolk knew the score
And fed us on roast beef and steak
Fish and Chips and currant cake
When our randy thoughts we couldn’t hide
And all their wants where satisfied