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JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

0 posted 2015-12-12 09:12 AM

I have returned.
apologize for things
left unsaid
I am overwhelmed at amount
of speculation
was given my departure
and especially Ticklefingers
I'd decided to take
December off to regroup
that was my outward thoughts
concerning my leaving
however that wasn't my real thoughts
there was another reason
yesterday I finally tried to
write about that real reason
I wrote this . . .

something is not right with me
my thoughts are all wrong
I want to take a break from everything
I need to give it a name
and so I named it
but I didn't like the name
so I took the name back,

I couldn't continue
the poem because the name I'd
given and taken back was
. . . depression . . .
I became scared, very much so.
Didn't know what to do
Go to the hospital see what they say.
never had these feelings before

I awoke at midnight last night
went to the fridge
grabbed a bottle of wine
drank some, not much
now I sit here drinking wine
at five minutes to five
Took some pain medication
plus sinus capsules
feel much better
so much better
I was able to walk Zoe

so! there you have it
I've been through all kinds of hell
but now I'm back
my poetry has suffered
as you can tell with this one
but I am back

I'm scared

~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~

[This message has been edited by JerryPat2 (12-12-2015 10:27 AM).]

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius

since 2009-10-10

Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere

1 posted 2015-12-12 10:07 AM

My dear friend,
Depression is scary. That is a very normal reaction. There is help that is very effective. Support is very important. You don't have to suffer alone. It is an illness. You are sick not crazy. My heart goes out to you because I know it can really suck. but it is temporary. Bless your heart

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

2 posted 2015-12-12 10:24 AM

Thank you, Lori, I knew you would understand. I'm feeling good today, but it it rears it ugly head again, I'll get help.

~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~

Ticklefingers
Senior Member
Posts 710
Louisiana

3 posted 2015-12-12 12:11 PM

That-a-Boy!

The next time you pull a stunt like that, it's the 'SWITCH' for you bub!

So glad you're back on the block JerryPat!

Mega 88's pal

She told me "play one for your supper Danny and maybe you'll get breakfast".

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

4 posted 2015-12-12 12:16 PM

Thank you, Ticklefingers, I appreciate your concern.

~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius

since 2001-10-23

Posts 10549
By the Seaside

5 posted 2015-12-12 12:41 PM

Awe JP, your honesty in the face of adversity is humbling. I admire your tenacity and your will to carry on. As they say, we all have our issues and many have it far worse. I commend you for walking through that door (one more time)

with your head held high. Be well good poet and may your holidays be merry and bright.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

6 posted 2015-12-12 12:58 PM

Many thanks, Blues, I'm not so sure I about my tenacity and the will to carry on. There were many moments yesterday and last night which were crippling to me.

Still, I am grateful to be back . . .

~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~

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