Open Poetry #49 |
Almost There |
rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
Almost There~ Clouds slung low and gray like bags beneath the eyes of morning, and the chilly sky closes her robe to the first cold trembling fingers of Autumn. Past eye-blink towns, and a rusted old truck forever parked in the shade, while Blues-Traveler plays.. trying to perk morning air, the perfect partner to coffee hot and inviting. Regrets are flung out the car window once they've been mulled over, land at the feet of road-side sunflowers who've heard them all before, yet they rise above the careless thought-litter offering grace in yellow-headed hope. Mundane mile markers skirt harvested lonely fields, as one waits patiently at his crossroads, and the motor hums an imaginary lyric of "Almost There"... © J |
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© Copyright 2015 Jan~ - All Rights Reserved | |||
JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
"skirt harvested lonely fields," WoW! What a dynamic line is this one. It causes the mind to wander, reflect and take refuge in it. . . . and yes! We're almost there . . . ~*~ When they give you ruled paper write sideways. ~*~ |
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Lori Grosser Rhoden Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202Fair to middlin' of nowhere |
This is wonderful!!! I love the metaphor you follow perfectly all the way through. You nailed the Midwest scenery. The imagery is great (love the robe) If this is your first, I can't wait for the next! way to go! ~L Welcome to the "Blue Buffet" |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
quote: How deeply captivating! Beautiful first offering. Welcome to Pip, rainyday! Margherita |
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jjote Senior Member
since 2002-12-25
Posts 1088Ontario, Canada |
You're not just almost there, but you're definitely there my dear...I just love all the images here, esp. the 1st verse....clouds the eye bags of morning, and I thought I'm the only one with the eye bags. |
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Mr Martini Member Posts 366 Beneath The Line |
"Regrets are flung out the car window" Sometimes love, I still think of her...and the $250 fine I was hit with for littering the highway. She would have loved your poetry as much as I. Here's to you and here's to me and should we ever disagree, here's to me! |
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rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
JP, Thank you, glad you liked that line, your comments do a poet-lady good. |
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rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
LGR, Pleased you liked, Thank you for the lovely response. rainyday J |
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rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
M, Thank you for the generous reply & warm welcome. rainyday J |
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rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
jjote, lol, Those darn eye-bags. Thank you for the kind reply. rainyday J |
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rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
*smiles*..Thank you Mr. M rainyday J |
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rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
Hmmmm..not seeing any of my replies to the Poet's who left comments on my Poem. |
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Pete_W Member Posts 185 Scotland (UK) |
The "...roadside flowers..." are great, I'll have to be more considerate when driving Pete |
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rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
Oh..ok..there they are ..see them now. |
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rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
PeteW, Your comment brought a grin, Thanks for the read. rainyday J |
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Constance Member
since 2001-07-28
Posts 393Ohio |
Absolutely love this poem. Margherita and I love the same verse too. Very, very fine work! smiles, Constance |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
even found my rusty old truck in this...james |
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rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
Constance, Thank you for the generous reply, glad you liked. rainyday J |
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rainyday Member Posts 304 Heartland USA |
Yes, that rusty old truck..forever parked in the shade. Thanks for reading JM rainyday J |
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