navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #49 » A Stop At The Diner
Open Poetry #49
Post A Reply Post New Topic A Stop At The Diner Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Ticklefingers
Senior Member
Posts 710
Louisiana

0 posted 2015-10-24 02:02 AM


the rains are falling across my heart
as the darkness settles in
from here there's nowhere left to go
I'll finish where I began

a mile or more to Coalville
the diners' open 'til eight
Angie works the last shift there
I'll have a cup and wait

she always seems to listen
most times its' really sad
how pitiful this man's become
when once his heart was glad

it always takes another love
to replace the one you had
and still you fight the loneliness
I tell you friend it's sad

but up ahead the lights are on
and Angies' pourin' joe
I tell you friend this breaking heart
has tougher rows to hoe

She told me "play one for your supper Danny and maybe you'll get breakfast".

© Copyright 2015 Danny - All Rights Reserved
Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere
1 posted 2015-10-24 07:32 AM


This sad story is charming in it's own way. It is so true what you say. Still, there is a Diner's light of hope at the end of the tunnel as you speak, keeping this from being a full out crying in your beer kind of piece.  Well done.

Diner, did someone say Diner? Mmmmm....biscuits and gravy sound good right about now.  ~L

latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
2 posted 2015-10-24 11:09 AM


Re Life's Journey  
        
            From There to Here
          
        Thinking back to graham crackers,
          and taking naps upon the mat.
                        
         To fast food servers,        
       filling endless cups of coffee,
         while old men sit and chat.

    jo perry Feb 2006
reminds me of my old one although shorter.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
3 posted 2015-10-24 12:07 PM


Loved this one to pieces. Wished I'd composed it. This is a very sad piece because the man of the poem knows full well nothing is going to get better . . . er . . . Of course there is Angie. Whether she is a love object or just a smiling face as she pours that joe, she is a bright light for him.

~*~ When they give you ruled paper write sideways. ~*~

Ticklefingers
Senior Member
Posts 710
Louisiana
4 posted 2015-10-24 05:01 PM


Thanks for the visit Miss Lori!
          See you at the diner around sevenish. The gravy is best when it simmers a few hours or so and the fresh-baked biscuits are soft and hot right out of the oven!

Be there or be square!  


88's doll

She told me "play one for your supper Danny and maybe you'll get breakfast".

Ticklefingers
Senior Member
Posts 710
Louisiana
5 posted 2015-10-24 05:07 PM


Hi Miss Jo,

If anything I write conjures up a favorable thought from your past, then pleased and honored am I.  

88's your way
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            

She told me "play one for your supper Danny and maybe you'll get breakfast".

Ticklefingers
Senior Member
Posts 710
Louisiana
6 posted 2015-10-24 05:13 PM


JerryPat says:
quote:
"Wished I'd composed it"

You did.

I stole it from you years ago. Now that I am in the repentance stage of my life, it will comfort you to know that your check is in the mail.

I withheld enough however, to buy Miss Lori some biscuits and gravy at the diner. After that, she's on her own.


88 debits your way friend

She told me "play one for your supper Danny and maybe you'll get breakfast".

Redstart
Senior Member
since 2014-05-16
Posts 535

7 posted 2015-10-24 06:27 PM


I doubt he has tougher rows to hoe. It ain't that easy. No it ain't that easy. Am I singing, no. Though it could be a song. Angie means nothing, and you know.

Ticklefingers
Senior Member
Posts 710
Louisiana
8 posted 2015-10-25 02:17 AM


Thanks for the visit Red.

There's no guesswork required. It's just a little piece of fiction. When I put my tales together the reader can make what they want of it.

Everyone's interpretation is right. No exceptions.

I don't care for 'Game Show' poetry.


88's friend

She told me "play one for your supper Danny and maybe you'll get breakfast".

2islander2
Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825
by the sea
9 posted 2015-10-30 12:21 PM


a very charming story, a sad romance can be better than nothing, o loved reading you


yann

secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !
10 posted 2015-10-31 08:52 AM


effective 'slice of life' write !

it is fascinating to see the many different writing styles of all the poets
that traverse these fine blue sands of 'P.I.P.-land' by the cyber-sea ...

Ticklefingers
Senior Member
Posts 710
Louisiana
11 posted 2015-10-31 11:23 PM


Thanks so much 2islander2 and SHDP!


88's friends

She told me "play one for your supper Danny and maybe you'll get breakfast".

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
12 posted 2015-11-02 06:08 PM


well put together...james
Ticklefingers
Senior Member
Posts 710
Louisiana
13 posted 2015-11-02 07:23 PM


Many thanks for your visit James.


88's friend

She told me "play one for your supper Danny and maybe you'll get breakfast".

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #49 » A Stop At The Diner

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary