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Open Poetry #49

He Had a Sweet Dream

Richy
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 3050

0 posted 2014-01-22 10:54 PM

We teach, and we teach,
and yet
we never learn

A year
of want, is just
a yearn

Nature, is a poem
diverse

Human beings
are
its curse

We need to
end
the human
race

The marathon,
is done

It’s hard to cross the finish
at
the barrel
of
begun

Being shows us, how
to blend
in morning and,
unite

Giving too my dreams away
will always, be
my write

Fear is just, a double edge
of bravery
and, threat

Hiding
in a world
apart
is where, apartheid
met

Everyone, was born
the same,
made all those words,
complete

it’s too bad that
equal
is,
an artificial sweet

photo 630828-M-0000T-002_zps3b634d5c.jpg

Gale
Senior Member

since 2013-06-10

Posts 578
Russia

1 posted 2014-01-23 12:29 PM

I like the structure of this poem, and
it's clever,
although I believe we don't really need "to
end
the human
race"
Why had it begun then? Just for such sad final?

EmmaRose
Senior Member

since 2011-03-02

Posts 1376
Midwest

2 posted 2014-01-23 09:34 AM

I like to believe the dream lives in many, sweet poem despite a bit of rancor infused in it for some punch

Richy
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 3050

3 posted 2014-01-25 05:21 PM

Thanks Gale, yes the part about ending the human race was simply a play on the word, race, as in a running contest. The next verses, “the marathon is done” and “It’s hard to cross the finish at the barrel of begun”.

It’s a tale of frustration about ending the, race for equality, because there really never was an end in the first place let alone the second.

A finish line is merely a border in, Finland.

Thanks again

Richy
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 3050

4 posted 2014-01-25 05:23 PM

I like to believe that too Emma.. it does in mine and i bet in your heart too..

thanks for all your wonderful and supportive reviews..

enjoy the weekend

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