diamonds and dysentery - pipTalk Forums

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EmmaRose
Senior Member

since 2011-03-02

Posts 1376
Midwest

0 posted 2013-07-12 08:47 AM

I swam against nautical miles for it
plunging deep in the abyss of anonymity
never knowing if I’d pull up diamonds or dysentery
in the riddle of waters

over iced over sycamores
deafened by baritone hymns that rang
from the lowlands, notorious for
the plagues of the 3 headed fire beasts

glimpsing the sun’s descent
running with caribou
jumping through shadows, in the
court jester’s mirror

finally hobbling, I bled caskets of rose petals
tarnished with thorns, lacerations that
calloused into sanity, finally,
finding the key could never unlock
anyone, other than me.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

1 posted 2013-07-12 09:01 AM

Okay, this is very well written poetry, Emma. You take the reader on a barbwire riddled journey. I loved how you reworked this word . . . kalloused. You are lashed and beaten, metaphorically, and maybe physically until finally you find the key. You are saved. Absolutely wonderful writing.

~*~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~*~

EmmaRose
Senior Member

since 2011-03-02

Posts 1376
Midwest

2 posted 2013-07-12 09:06 AM

yes, saved from the insanity of "Love" (for now anyhow, fingers crossed)
thanks for the very perceptive take on this.
good Friday morning

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-11-07

Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa

3 posted 2013-07-12 10:23 AM

Whew, EmmaRose! As Jerry said, you certainly took us all with you. I am exhausted and aching, lol! Superbly thought out and written as well, as always! I am happy for the ending though it has its sad side as well - but I must agree, that not being in love is a lot more comfortable than being in love!

Owl

jwesley
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-04-30

Posts 7563
Spring, Texas

4 posted 2013-07-12 11:37 AM

reminiscent of Dante's Inferno! Quiet punishing and gruesome.

good read,

jimmy

EmmaRose
Senior Member

since 2011-03-02

Posts 1376
Midwest

5 posted 2013-07-14 02:07 PM

thank you for stopping by. I am humbled by such wonderful insightful poets I find here reading me

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

6 posted 2013-07-18 10:26 PM

Very nice...James

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

7 posted 2013-07-19 02:46 AM

over iced over sycamores
deafened by baritone hymns that rang

Wheeew, Lady EmmaRose, this was quite the poetic ride!

Excellent write.

Margherita

Lady Goodman
Member

since 2012-10-04

Posts 193

8 posted 2013-07-19 03:06 AM

*smile*

You write modern day Jungian..laughing

I dunno.

You defy classification.

I really love that.

Enjoyed.

ebonygirl
Member Elite

since 2011-07-14

Posts 2000
California U.S.A

9 posted 2013-07-19 06:39 AM

Well done, EmmaRose!
Enjoyed,
Ms. E

Kaoru

Member Elite

since 2003-06-07

Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow

10 posted 2013-07-19 07:20 AM

This is outstanding! I love it

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