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Open Poetry #48
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Do not forsake
| Open Poetry #48 |
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Do not forsake |
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Gale Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578Russia 
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I don't know what you will think about it... This is my translation (rather free) of a song by E. Krylatov and L. Derbenyov called "Ne pokiday" ("Do not forsake"), the song from the children's film of the same name. I'm not sure that it's a successful endeavor, but I tried to do my best, because I like the song very much. So here it is. Do not forsake You may fly above the starlight You may walk around the Earth But I plead, don’t leave me, darling Be my angel till the death Anytime, in every season Through the day and through the night Don’t forget, you are my breathing Don’t forget, you are my life At starlit midnight In the light of day Please never leave me Do not forsake The world may vanish All the friends may go I won’t survive Without you My love Life confusing, love forgotten Make you suffer and mistake But even for a single moment Beg you, please do not forsake Searching hard for any reason In the dark, bereft of hope Don’t forget, you are my breathing Don’t forget, you are my all At starlit midnight In the light of day Please never leave me Do not forsake The skies may fall in And love betray You are my call To try it all again 25/06/2013 I couldn,t find a link to the original song on Youtube (without an advertisement), so I made a clip myself, and you can listen to it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qiGlcV4Ln2M |
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| © Copyright 2013 Galina Italyanskaya - All Rights Reserved | |||
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
That's it! Don't ever expect me to call you Gale again when you have a name as beautiful as Galina Italyanskaya!!! Beautiful sounding names fascinate me. I wrote a poem about the names of 2 members of a Japanaese gymnastic team. I also wrote another one about the name of somebody called Tahira Mia - I can't remember who he or she (I think she) is - I know I heard it on TV because I didn't know how to spell it, and in that poem, I also included the name of a friend called Nangula Nafuka. Nangula (who calls herself Nangy, but I refuse to call her that as I think Nangula - and particularly with her surname - is much more beautiful) is a young friend from another poetry forum. I think she is about 19 now. She lives in Namibia and we have emailed each other for some years now. What an amazing experience your video is, Galina! Beautiful translation - there is no need to change it at all if you would rather not, but if you are agreeable to it, I would suggest a few very minor changes to make it perfect English - I would never have mentioned that, but with the MAGNIFICENT video you made, I think it deserves that - I don't have time to help with that now (not that it would take long - but I shouldn't even be in Pip now as I have so much work pressure from my boss (me), but if you would like me to help with that, I can make the time - possibly tonight) - the singer's voice is to die for, and I LOVED hearing him singing it in Russian, and those images, WOW! WOW! WOW! And sorry, but here comes another WOW! It insisted of its own accord! I see that you have 17 videos. I haven't the time to open them now, but will in bits when I can make the time. Owl ^_^ (0,0) ( ) --,,-- |
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Gale Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578Russia |
Thank you, Owl! I don't know if I can change it, but I would like to know what changes you mean. Tell me please ) |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
It's fine the way it is. The changes are just little ones. I will make time tonight to do so, or as soon after that as possible. Smiles. Owl |
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Gale Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578Russia |
Ok. I'm about to spend the rest of this week in the forest. So I'll be able to reply just after I come back. Talk soon! |
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JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
Hi Gale. There is a song over here by the name of "Do Not Forsake Me Oh My Darling." It is a very old song. I liked your translation very much on your song and the video especially was good. I appreciated reading and watching. ~*~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~*~ |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
In the forest? Oh, how absolutely gorgeous! Enjoy!!! I'll email those little things, but it is still lovely the way it is! Owl |
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Gale Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578Russia |
Thank you, Jerry ) I never heard that song you told me about, but I'll find it and listen ) |
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Gale Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578Russia |
Owl, yes, in the forest, and I've come back  I've read your letter and will reply it soon. I just want to thank you here. You're right, I think, there can be some grammatical mistakes in my poems. But there is a reason why I can't change them. I don't write verses as I wrote exercises at school. I write them in a different state of mind, in one go, I can't control the process completely, sonner it controls me. And each my poem reflects me as I am at the moment (including my level of English ). And I think that it's true. If I try to change something, I will kill everything. It's hard.But anyway if you notice any mistake, you may tell me. I would like to be informed ) |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
I understand completely, Gale. I also don't change my poetry when others suggest it, because then it wouldn't feel like mine or what I was feeling at the time I wrote it - and, as I said, your poem and video are absolutely lovely as they are. Smiles. I have read your lovely email and I am busy replying to it now. Perhaps I will only finish it tomorrow as it is late and I am tired, but once I start talking - especially in an email, it is difficult for me to stop. Smiles. See you in the email tonight or tomorrow. Owl |
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Gale Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578Russia |
You understand me! Thank you, Owl ) Lovely icon! |
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