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Open Poetry #48
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Gale
Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578
Russia

0 posted 2013-06-19 10:57 AM


Hi!
I want to share with you a song which I like very much.
It's a ballade of Bulat Okudzhava called "The Night Talk". It was written in Russian, and I've tried to translate it into English a few years ago.
Here is the result.

The Night Talk

- My steed is so tired,
My shoes are worn-out.
My friend, could you show me
The path I should follow,
The way I have lost?

- You’d go to the sunset,
The land of Blue Mountains,
Along the Red River,
The river, my dear,
Which flows from the west.

- And where are the mountains,
That river and sunset?
I’m here in the night!
See! How can I find
That part of the world?

- It’s easy, my dear,
You must feel no fear
And look for the light
Somewhere in the night,
It’s shining like gold.

- But where is that light,
That fire I should find,
And where is my luck?
I rove in the dark
Exhausted and cold!

- My dear, I don’t know!
It had to be so!
The man who must keep it,
I guess, he is sleeping,
It isn’t my fault!

He went on his roaming
So tired and blown
By thousand winds.
But what does it mean,
And where is the end?

- My dear! – I cried,
- What is it you strive for?
He turned to me lonely
And answered: - If only
I knew it, my friend!      


August’08

© Copyright 2013 Galina Italyanskaya - All Rights Reserved
JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
1 posted 2013-06-19 11:17 AM


I like it. A conversation which confuses and helps not the traveler, except giving him things to look for and to see, but not how to find these things. The ending stanza tells us the wanderer is a man who is truly a wanderer seeking something, he knows not what. Could his elusive goal be peace of mind?

~*~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~*~

Gale
Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578
Russia
2 posted 2013-06-19 11:27 AM


Thank you, Jerry!
I hope he's looking for something real,
even if he doesn't realize it yet.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
3 posted 2013-06-19 01:31 PM


Isn't that the way life is for the most part, searching and not really knowing what we are really searching for?

~*~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~*~

Gale
Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578
Russia
4 posted 2013-06-19 01:37 PM


I don't know if it's the most part of lifetime,
but I can say for sure that very often it's a great part )

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
5 posted 2013-06-19 01:52 PM


I guess you are right.
Honeybunch
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115
South Africa
6 posted 2013-06-20 02:31 AM


Enjoyable read!  I think Jerry's right.  Peace of mind no matter the circumstances of life is perhaps the only worthwhile goal to achieve.  The night speaks of that peace but the day snatches its words and throws them to the wind.  And so we continue searching with no idea what we're looking for.  

Helen

Gale
Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578
Russia
7 posted 2013-06-20 02:46 AM


Thank you, Helen )

I don't know for sure, if it's not against the rules, but since this poem was inspired by the song, I would like to give you a link to the original. It's just a short clip on YouTube, not mine, but at least you could listen to it )

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpbNvxXCLNA

I tried to keep the sense although the metre is different.

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
8 posted 2013-06-20 04:43 PM


Hauntingly beautiful, Gale.  So much is usually lost in translation - so I can't imagine how beautiful it must be in Russian!  I once, many, many years ago spent a few hours - in a break from studying for a university exam - delving into a book called Teach Yourself Russian and taught myself the Russian alphabet and pronunciation - and was fascinated that several letters of the alphabet resembled the Greek alphabet (my favourite part of one of my majors - Classical Civilisation), but I am rambling . . . Your exquisite poem is reminisicent of the following poem, which you possibly know (but of course, the mood is exactly the opposite, bringing comfort and answers, where yours brings questions that are not answered in the poem - the two poems complementing each other, being the different sides of the same coin):

UPHILL

Does the road wind uphill all the way?
Yes, to the very end.
Will the day’s journey take the whole long day?
From morn to night, my friend.

But is there for the night a resting-place?
A roof for when the slow, dark hours begin.
May not the darkness hide it from my face?
You cannot miss that inn.

Shall I meet other wayfarers at night?
Those who have gone before.
Then must I knock, or call when just in sight?
They will not keep you waiting at the door.

Shall I find comfort, travel-sore and weak?
Of labour you shall find the sum.
Will there be beds for me and all who seek?
Yea, beds for all who come.

- Christina Rossetti

Thank you for the pleasure of reading your poem, and reliving the excitement of my few hours with Russian, a magical language to listen to.

Owl

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
9 posted 2013-06-20 04:54 PM


I have just followed the link, and, of course, it is in Russian!  What a pleasure!  (I didn't understand a word and had forgotten all I taught myself all those years ago, so couldn't read the title either - I wish I had the time to immerse myself in that book again.)  I didn't have enough memory on my computer (as I have been all over on the Internet tonight) for it to play more than a couple of the conversational parts, but I recognised immediately the beautiful haunting quality that you reproduced in your poem.  

Owl

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
10 posted 2013-06-20 09:50 PM


Nice work...James
Gale
Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578
Russia
11 posted 2013-06-21 03:46 AM


Thank you, James, for reading and replying!
Gale
Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578
Russia
12 posted 2013-06-21 04:14 AM


Thank you,Owl )
I didn't know the poem you quoted, but now I know, and it's beautiful and comforting indeed )
It sounds like a lullaby.
Thank you for sharing it!
It's rather suprising that you took an interest in Russian language )
I love it, it's my native language, and I know a few people from other countries who like it too. Though I also know those who find it sounding terrible
Cyrillic is close to Greek alphabet indeed, because its basis was taken from Byzantium with Orthodoxy.
Concerning subs in that clip, they say that it's the song of B.O. called "The Night Talk", as I told above, and that it's performed by Sergey Nikitin and Tatyana Nikitina (she's his wife). They say also the clip was made by I. Boursky. That's all. The rest is just the song and images )
I'm very glad that you like the song and my translation )

Best regards!

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
13 posted 2013-06-21 09:22 AM


Gale, thank you for your friendly and informative reply.  I can't imagine how anyone can think that Russian sounds horrible - I think it is powerful and exciting and delicious!

And I nearly forgot to say that I just love your first line - that you (and/or the song-writer included your/his/her horse and was/were compassionate towards him or her).  I had the most wonderful horse on the planet for 20½ years and knew him for 2 years before that.  He went to Heaven on 28 April 2002 and I still miss him with every fibre of my being.

Owl

Gale
Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578
Russia
14 posted 2013-06-21 09:38 AM


Concerning languages, saying that only kittens please one and all  
Glad that you like it, Owl )

I never had a horse.
When I was a child I imagined that my bike is my horse
My niece is crazy about them and spent a plenty of time at stabling )

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
15 posted 2013-06-21 11:20 AM


I enjoyed what you said about kittens!  I love all animals.  I (and my 2 children) only got my horse when I was an adult.  As a child, I read a book called Wish for a Pony 7 times and had horse-riding lessons and saved up my pocket money for a year to be able to ride on all the horse-rides when my mother and I went to a holiday resort in the mountains for 2 weeks every year.  My friend from 2 houses up from mine, had a wooden gate and we used to sit on the 2 halves of it and pretend they were horses - because I was having riding lessons I rode the half that didn't a "bridle" and her half had the latch which we pretended was a bridle.  

Owl

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
16 posted 2013-06-21 11:49 AM


.


Wait for me, and I’ll return - only wait very hard;
Wait until you are filled with sorrow as you watch the yellow rain;
Wait when the wind sweeps the snowdrifts;
Wait in the sweltering heat;
Wait when others have stopped waiting, forgetting their yesterdays;
Wait when even from afar no letters come to you;
Wait even when others are tired of waiting;
Wait even when my mother and son think I am no more;
And when friends sit around the fire drinking to my memory,
Wait, and do not hurry to drink to my memory too;
Wait, for I’ll return, defying every death;
And let those who do not wait say I was lucky;
They will never understand that, in the midst of death,
You, with your waiting, saved me;
Only you and I will know how I survived -
It’s because you waited as no one else did.


Konstantin Simonov, 1941

.


Gale
Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578
Russia
17 posted 2013-06-21 12:03 PM


I know this poem of Simonov, Huan )
And it's my favourite.
I know it by heart.

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