Open Poetry #48 |
Look, But Don't Touch |
Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
The whispers of the ocean calls to me and memories are grains of sand returning with your image in the wind near the dunes where we made love hiding from peering eyes, look, but dont touch, as you tasted forbidden fruit. You took a bite and wanted more, and you were greedy with desire I hold you dear to my heart under lock and key in the treasure chest of my mind, Thoughts of you play on like an old movie, but you will never be "Gone With The Wind" And as you walked away the whispers in my heart screamed, like Scarlett O'hara "Please, please dont go, take me with you" but you left me feeling like a common morning glory within the tousled sheets of a bad hair day. Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage. by Ambrose Bierce [This message has been edited by Victoria (12-07-2012 05:42 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2012 Victoria - All Rights Reserved | |||
Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
A memory worth clinging to. This was lovely Victoria. Michael |
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2islander2 Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825by the sea |
movely and touching, enjoyed a lot yann |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
Thank you Michael and Yann for peeking in, So glad you both enjoyed. |
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ebonygirl Member Elite
since 2011-07-14
Posts 2000California U.S.A |
Enjoyed your poem, made me smile. Ms. E |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
Im glad I made you smile Ms.E. Thank you for peeking in. ~V~ Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage. by Ambrose Bierce |
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Amberzlynnc Member
since 2010-08-24
Posts 229New Jersey |
Great read, thanks for sharing! -Amber |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
tousled sheets of a bad hair day. Very poetic!!! |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
Thank you Amber and Balladeer, So nice to hear from both of you.Glad you enjoyed. Happy Holidays. ~Victoria~ Life is a great big canvas-Throw all the paint on it you can. -- Danny Kaye [This message has been edited by Victoria (12-10-2012 09:56 AM).] |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
I thought I'd already replied ... oh well, much enjoyed this anyway my friend and agree with big "B" j. |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
Thank you Jimmy, always nice to hear from you and happy holidays to you. ~V~ Life is a great big canvas-Throw all the paint on it you can. |
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Stumpjumper Junior Member
since 2012-12-11
Posts 10 |
A pleasant poem, neatly divided in two: 'the act' then 'the feelings in response'. There's a failure of agreement in the first two lines: '... whisper of the ocean CALLS to me' or '...whispers of the ocean CALL to me'. |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
Thank you for peeking in and I tried to change that but its too late but thank you for pointing that out. ~V~ Life is a great big canvas-Throw all the paint on it you can. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Fine romantic writing...James |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
Thank you James, and hope you have a romantic weekend. Happy holidays. |
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