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Open Poetry #48

help with haiku

chickoo007
Member

since 2007-11-06

Posts 70
India

0 posted 2012-07-12 02:43 PM

Can this be termed a haiku ?

In the night's dark and sleepy abode,
I awaken,
To a world fashioned of dreams.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

1 posted 2012-07-12 02:56 PM

Syllable count for a haiku is 7-5-7 / There are variations, but this is the old standby. So, no, I don't count this as a haiku.

The night's dark, sleepy abode,
He swiftly awakes
To a world fashioned of dreams.

Actually your original and the one I did are senryu's.

Haiku is all about nature.

Anything other than nature is a senryu.

~*~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~*~

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